O0oh, my soul!

NEW BLOG ALERT!

2005-04-19T09:32:00.000+08:00

To my readers, er, that would only be medz... medz, thanks for your appreciation! she who was initially only a fellow UP student became a friend, a sweeeeeeeeeeeeet one at that. well medz, good news or bad news, i just opened a new blog.

http://noblah.blogspot.com

come on, admit it, kapoy ayo basa ug long posts so in my new blog, i'm trying to blog everything in a paragraph or two. (i promise, I won't just try, i'll DO IT.) i haven't posted pics yet (hopefully soon, from february's prom to the present.) and... well, there, good bye to this blog.

dozing off... Z2sZzzzZzzz22SZ....

Chatarachi

2004-11-08T21:00:00.000+08:00

i just found out that one of our housequeens (the term i borrowed referring to our group of dogs allowed to enter our house), Chachi, has cataract which will cause her blindness soon. i felt so crashed for her. i'm not really close to Chachi. for one, we only got her from tita Anna in April so i wasn't really able to spend time with her since i have to get back to cebu for school. next reason, my favorite housequeen has always been Chinchin, my best unconditional friend. anyway, i felt so down after hearing the news that for the very first time (since april), i curled her in a hug in my arms. she's only less than one human year old. of course, there's always the option to operate her.

BUT, it's such a rare case among dogs and the only doctor (not a vetenirarian, at that) who could do it is all the way in tacloban. and the operation would also be very expensive and more complicated since she won't only need the operation, she'll also be needing dog lens (if there's such). when i heard about all the complexities, i felt so helpless. she's still so young and she hasn't enjoyed life to the fullest yet. plus, how could she understand the sudden darkness that will soon embrace her? what will her life be like? we can't just leave her going around, bumping her head in walls and God forbid, falling in deep holes! She's gonna go crazy. You know what i think, she's gonna go crazy. papa suggested to give her a mercy killing. the two-word tandem creeps me out but to save chachi from complete misery, i don't think it would sound as creepy anymore. i feel really sad. poor doggy. poor chachi.

i was so pissed off that i yelled at chinchin, "You're gonna die young because you're too picky with your food," when she ignored the milk and dog food i gave her. maybe i shouldn't spoil my dogs in cebu anymore to make them feel how lucky they are that the only problem they're facing is when they'll be fed again while chachi has only a few moments left before darkness steals the beauty around her completely.

...

Before Sunset has got to be one of the most touching romantic films i've ever seen, if not, the only truly touching romantic flick i've ever seen. the movie ran for only around an hour and 95% of that time's completely in conversation. but it's no ordinary conversation. first, the setting was in Paris. next, the conversation wasn't dull. i loved the script. third, the actors were magnificent. nobody could have done a better job than julia delpy and ethan hawke. credit for the effectiveness of the movie has to be theirs and the way they carried on with their conversation. there was no kissing or any public display of affection to show how much they fell for each other. their expressions gave it all away. it was so touching i almost cried at the end. ok, i wouldn't want to give out more. if only the industry could produce more touching romantic films as this, i would appreciate the whole concept of romantic flicks more.

I cried because i could feel the love they had for each other and how they wanted to let it out but needed to just supress it. it sounds crap (especially for an anti-too-much-love-stories film buff like me) but that's how nice the movie is, it has converted me for a while. naks. and i'd have to say that for a while, i dreamed for nothing else but a romance like that.

...

Shall we dance? is also a good and unique love story. before you start cringing at the thought of jennifer lopez being richard gere's mistress (with no less than susan surrandon as gere's wife), you better watch the movie first. it's fun, it's cute, it's cool (ooh, ballroom didn't look to bad) and it's kinda... touching. (hehe, that has become a favorite term)

...

i finally posted the pictures! i would like to give more details about UP's Intrams 2004 (that would be too late now, wouldn't it be?), my sem break (well, just think that 70% of it was spent eating), my Trick or Treat (oooh fun, fun, fun!), and the All Saints' and Souls' Days but...

ahm, there's always the BUT and nothing to support it. so just deal away with the pics, ok (hopefully, only for now)? 'Til then!

...

Funny, i'm still thinking of the same guy...

2004-11-08T20:37:00.000+08:00

Isn't Bienni pretty? She originally didn't have a costume so we just did away with some old cloths from tita Didang and made a gypsy girl out of her. Look at that cutie -- sickness, luas and all!

2004-11-08T19:33:00.000+08:00

One of my many attempts to seriously take up swimming, practice, practice, practice, and make it to the Beijing Olympics 2004. Whooooohooooo! If not, there's always my last UP Intramurals 2005! God willing!

2004-11-08T19:32:00.000+08:00

The Christmas tree for me illuminates the darkening sky trapping our country -- and the world -- in an unwanted embrace. Forty-eight days to go? (this pic really reminds me of the Home Alone theme song... tenen-tenen-tenen... of course, you didn't get that)

2004-11-08T19:30:00.000+08:00

It is indeed my most awaited time of the year! I know how companies take advantage of the profitable event but that's just beside the point that Christmas takes people away from reality. It gives a reason for people to smile. It's not just about the gifts, the food, the gathering... besides, without the real reason for the celebration -- that is the birth of Christ -- there wouldn't be any gift, food or gathering at all! That's why I love this event so much. I love it that I'm planning to trim down and save tummy space for the Christmas feast (make that feasts); I'm planning on how to Christmas spice up my desk in Cebu; I'm planning to make Christmas earings; I'm planning to complete the Novena leading to Christmas day; I'm planning to be really happy while waiting for it. Some of my friends complain how Filipinos start celebrating this joyous occasion way too early, well, I don't think there's anything wrong with it at all. See how our Christmas tree brings out the joy in me!

2004-11-08T19:29:00.000+08:00

Where else can you find a dog with so much emotion in her face? In this picture, I can really see myself in her. Meet my most unconditional friend.

2004-11-08T19:28:00.000+08:00

And the cutest of them all! My Chinchin! Take note of the near-sagging tongue. This was taken during one of her "sun-bathing" sessions by the driveway early in the morning. I love her so!

2004-11-08T19:27:00.000+08:00

Me and my buddy cousins Kuyang and Allyssa. Scary Halloo0o0oo0ooween!

2004-11-08T19:25:00.000+08:00

The makeshift cave (c/o tita Didang and Enrique) up close with Lyssa as the Candy giver (in Scream killer mask). That's Tito Bingcol, Mamita, Tita Marilou, and Mother with Bien at the swing. Swing it! Halloween and All Saints' Day are two of the most awaited family gatherings each year. We always gather in Paradise Village for Trick or Treat and at the Cebu Memorial Park to have dinner and hang out with our beloved departed, Lolo Inting and tita Menching.

2004-11-08T19:24:00.001+08:00

The people really loved tita Didang's decoration that many had their pics taken with it. Whoohooo!

2004-11-08T19:24:00.000+08:00

The gang's all here! That's Me, gypsy girl Bienni, nun Becca, witch Kate, Ting (in white jersey), Peter Pan Lyle, Joefrance (in orange pointed hat), fairy Rica, Carlyn (in jumpsuit), Samurai Enrique and ninja Alejandro.

2004-11-08T19:22:00.000+08:00

"Trick or treat, Smell my Feet, Give me something good to eat! If you don't, I dont care, I will get your underwear!" Haha! This was supposedly Enrique's song for this year's Halloween Trick or Treat. I guess he was too excited though "Trick or Treat" even sounded too long. Anyway, that's tita Didang's Halloween backdrop with the makeshift cave at the back (you can't miss that!) and mamita's spiderwebs and other thingamajigs all the way from Canada. The kids here are getting ready for the walk around the park. For candies, why not?

2004-11-08T19:21:00.000+08:00

All smiles after the festivities and the food! Yummymia!

2004-11-08T19:20:00.000+08:00

The whole Spanish class with our teacher, Madame Bartolo (2nd from right). Gracias Mil, Usted! Por que de tu, yo me habla Espanol! (Did I get that right? I meant to say, "Because of you, I now speak little Spanish!)

2004-11-08T19:19:00.000+08:00

How could I forget? One of our final Spanish moments was our Spanish festival! Of course, I signed up for the food committee! Even with the time constraint, tight budget and the big challenge of whipping up good recipes (to make our classmates' P60 worth it), I had no regrets. In fact, I'd do that again. Well, not counting Neil's failed Eggplant recipe. (The committee decided to simply microwave it in my place but Neil insisted in bringing it over to his tita's to use the oven instead. The next thing we knew, he called us in tears and telling us to scrap the eggplant recipe. Wha? It turned out that everything slipped from his hands on the way to school. I would have really strangled him if my classmates weren't happy with the other foods and of course, for the wine he bought to make it all up. Tihi. The food committee members (except for Neil) Kara, Celeste, Bam, Lai and Me -- all smiles before our recipes! Wheee!

2004-11-08T19:17:00.000+08:00

We really ignored the scorching heat of the sun and the threats of "kapagawan" just to cheer our athletes through. Whooohoooo!

2004-11-08T19:16:00.000+08:00

Whoohoo! The Humanities Soccer Team with their coach (in blue)! The 2004 UP Intrams Champs! Humanities United!

2004-11-08T19:15:00.000+08:00

There goes our coolest skater girl, the Humanities Ms. Intrams bet,Patricia (3rd from left) and her escort, Ash, plus the busiest girl during the Instrams days, Narsh (1st from left) and Lyza, the "costume designer" (4th from left). (hehe)

2004-11-08T19:14:00.000+08:00

Whoohoo! Go Arts.Comm! We were quite pissed because the sound system totally failed our squad on their first showdown so they had to perform again. That just ruined everything. But even in 4th place, our heads were held up high!

Chatarachi

2004-11-08T11:12:00.000+08:00

2004-11-06T22:34:00.000+08:00

And the real trophy goes to the firm Humanities fan base for being such pros! We loved our job so much -- even the jumping, shouting, voice-losing, teasing -- that the number of fans even outnumbered the total number of Humanities athletes!

2004-11-06T22:32:00.000+08:00

Go Art.Comm! (I told you the "S" was missing! Thanks to Dale!)

2004-11-06T22:30:00.000+08:00

The dragonfly at the back of my neck

2004-11-06T22:28:00.000+08:00

Intramurals 2004! Isn't the Humanities shirt the coolest? We decided to defy the usual blue, green, yellow, red-colored intrams shirt and donned this loud pink tee. Go Fine Arts! Go Mass Comm! Humanities United!

Overnight FANatics

2004-10-24T20:00:00.000+08:00

To see is to believe, indeed. Before last night, I never thought the local R&B sensation Jay-R has what it takes to earn the country's "Prince of R&B" title. Seeing his MTVs and his stints in SOP and other shows just didn't justify anything. Thanks to the concert last night at the Ormoc Superdome, I have officially become a Jay-R fan, and this goes with a very good reason -- he's not just looks, he's a SUPER performer. Finally, we can boast of an R&B artist with killer smile, killer eyes, killer moves, killer performing skills and of course, a killer voice. He might idolize Usher but he doesn't look OA when he does follow him. He's his own Usher and carries it superbly well! And not to degrade the skills of the veteran Pops and Jimmy, but Jay-R really saved the night. Pops didn't do much convincing that she still owns the "Concert Queen" tag while Jimmy wasn't at his usual stand-up comedian self. His voice became really irritating. Or was it just that I was comparing it to the solid, cool voice of Jay-R? I wouldn't be lieing if I'd say that everyone became instant fans of his. He really rocked the night away. Even Joy's hubby Jun jokingly said that he has also become one of the "screaming girls". Me, too! Earlier on, I just gave applause after every song but later, I couldn't help but scream along the loudening shriek of the whole superdome every time Jay-R pops out. The industry needs real talent? There goes a real talent.

... Literally speaking, the superdome was brimming with people. The last time I saw the dome filled for a concert, it was Gary V's! And there's no need to explain why he could draw such crowd. He's Gary V, after all. Probably majority of the crowd was excited to see Pops, but it was definitely Jay-R that earned the loudest applause.

... Jimmy's pianist is a cutie! He played alongside Jimmy and several songs for Jay-R and Pops and it was amazing how he played with the keys. Oooh! The reason why I appreciated the show most -- after letting me realize what an amazing performer Jay-R is, of course -- was that the three artists made collaborations that could make you say that they really prepared for the concert. Jay-R and Jimmy did a KC&Jojo original. It was Jay-R's first song and I was already mesmerized -- rather, everyone was mesmerized. He saved Jimmy's schreeching voice! (Sorry, Jimmy! But really, this guy's also great!) The piano (and the pianist, of course ;) was terrific! Jay-R also brought along 2 dancers and a rapper/friend Jimmy M. (something). The two sang "Knock me off my feet" a Capella. Aaaaaamazing. Later on, Pops did "Someday, we'll know" (that love can move the mountains -- what's that song again?) with Jimmy B. and Jay-R and "Bakit Ngayon Ka lang" with Jimmy. (It should have been Jay-R... ugh!)

... Jay-R's really a sweetie. After his 2nd upbeat song, he was already sweating buckets so while he was standing near the edge of the stage, a grade schooler girl just approached and lent him her handkerchief. I think he was really touched by that gesture because he showed so much appreciation to that young girl, "Cathy". He "serenade" her; he went near her; he looked at her direction several times; he gave her a poster with a message; he waved at her (when he came back after his stint to sing with Pops) and later on said, "Thanks everybody! Thanks Cathy!" WHAT? Well, I bet everybody wished they were Cathy! There was also a part when he walked to the middle of the superdome court, this despite that so many people were already surrounding him. And he was still able to croon in an amazingly drop-dead way. Hai...

... Along with the whole crowd last night, I have become a jolog. But at least we have become jologs over an amazing talent and a super guy. Later that night, Maica, Monic and Sheryl were able to meet him through Edwin at Sabin's and commonly testified what a sincere gentleman he was. Maica said that he'd really stare through your eyes while he shakes your hand. Ooooh, I missed that. What more? My camera's busted. What more? Tina asked why we didn't drop by their place where the whole entourage lunched in. I know we missed a lot and we heartbreakingly realized this after seeing Jay-R performed. Ohhhh.

... Jay-R! Jay-R! Exactly how many times have I mentioned his name in this post? Jay-R! Jay-R! I think we'll be seeing more SOP this time.

in my own "one-sentence" guise

2004-10-23T23:00:00.000+08:00

I think I'm talking too much. Seeing my friends' blogs, I realized that... I really talk too much! While their posts are humble at 1-2 pages each, mine boasts of 10 pages... each! Am I really talkative? Or do I describe events in too flowery a manner? Or is it just that I have SO many things to talk about?

So to rebound from that, I'll try to squeeze everything I want to say about the things that have occurred in just a sentence. At least I'll try.

... Before I left for Ormoc for the break, I promised to lessen my eating. I'd rather call this discipline than dieting because "to eat" for me during the last 3 weeks of school meant (nearly) 3 full meals, 2 full snacks and chocolates in between. I literally gorged myself with everything I wanted to eat that my friends, everytime we see each other, were no longer surprised to see me "carrying" anything edible. Shame! But stress has that kind of effect on me. I wanted a hole out but there's no way I could succumbed to that cowardice. Therefore, I resorted to eating. And it pretty much helped me reimburse the "energy lost" during my sleeping time that has dozed off from (normally) 8 hours to 5 hours, 3 hours, 1 and 30 hours to none at all. The funny thing is, eating wasn't necessary because despite the no sleep nights, I was still up and alive. Fatigue was rarely in my dictionary and the "sleepless nights" were merely a genuine excuse to eat. (If you get what I mean.)

ANYWAY, now here in Ormoc, my sisters and I have kept up with our jogging everyday promise. YET, we're still eating. BUMMER.

... Let me just go through the last things we did for all our subjects:

Dev Comm was our earliest deadline. But it was great because the burden it has caused would have killed me. Nevertheless, it felt great that even though we didn't get the 100 points needed to get a flat 1 for that particular project, we actually produced something for our agency (which hopefully won't let them forget us. tsk.) In the end, we came up with 3 posters and 1 comics. I realized how I sometimes relent to mediocrity because while I was okay with big fat 80 points, my partner Hera was kind of disappointed about it. I would have sealed another 20 points if I did the article but on the night I was supposed to make it, Iana and her friends invited me along to the aftermath of the feast of the small town Argao. (yeah, an aftermath that still included 10 cooking versions of pig. Yum, yum, yum!) On a school night just a week before the finals, we rode the public bus to Argao just to eat. That was pretty much a first time experience and definitely, if they'd know, my parents would kill us.

BC 130 thanks to this, we spent 2 sleeeeeepless nights for the presentation of our radio station proposal. to add to that, we also spared much headaches, little arguments, martial law attitude, and so much money (at least, in the standard of a thrifty maroon) for it. it was just too bad we got a teacher who thinks it was only her subject we were majoring on. i don't know if i'm gonna miss her. she was a nice person, but as a teacher... *shrug* *shrug*

Journ 104 i love Ms. for giving us our final project -- a newsletter with a personally chosen theme -- but i was stunned she still gave us a mean finals exam (well, i know this is normal but she promised daw that she wouldn't give one). Anyway, i still love that teacher for some reason. Although she isn't as competitive, she was... cool. Anyway, on the night before our finals and newsletter deadline, i was uber full from tito paquito's birthday celebration. i actually finished 3 fat quesadillas. *Oh, heaven!* And that was just for appetizer (aside from the raw salmon sandwiched between 2 skyflakes i was forced to have; i actually just squeezed it in the back pocket of my jeans; sorry, tita Marissa!). i had 2 servings from the main food table and 3 visits to the dessert table. I'm a pig!

i went straight to work for my newsletter until the misfortune of a brownout shone upon us at 10:30 to 11:30. After that short intermission, i went back to work for my "Human Rights Watcher" newsletter. i was so engrossed with it that i actually thought of regularly making it -- no kidding. Plus, i no longer slept. right after saving the final copy in my disc, i went straight to the shower. Hai...!

Spanish just as i thought i could compensate for my no sleep on Sunday night, Gee and John Su came over on Monday night so we could help each other out for our Spanish final exams -- a speech in Spanish! My golly! i never felt so unenthusiastic in my whole life. Every attempt to start my speech seemed like walking a mile under the hottest sun. gee and john finished their speech and slept at 3 am while i, despite that i wasn't able to get through a sentence yet, also slept at 3 am. thick faced, you'd say. i woke up at 930, logged on to the internet, opened MIRC (after years of not doing so) and went to the Spain channel. Smartie? Oh, yeah! even though i was one of those who were asked to redo their speech, i was still grateful that some people did help me. gee, thanks!

Economics guess how thick-faced your favorite lola Ivi is? Right after the Spanish speech, i went along with Gee and John Su to Naga (Gee's hometown) just to eat again (since they just celebrated their fiesta). Take note that we did this the night before our Economics exam. i can't believe my face! i guess after all those sleepless hours and the long trip, i just slept through sentences and sentences of economic nature. (duh, how exciting could it be?) right after the exam that i deserved to fail in since i didn't do much studying for, gee and i planned an eat-all-you-can feast for Cedric's birthday with john su, kara, mae, and keith at Dim Sum. needless to say, i... feasted! when i got back home, it didn't take long for me to run to the bed. i totally missed it! wednesday night was the only finals weeknight when i had a realllllll sleep (6 hours, tops).

Comm 120 What a bum! older mass comm students told us that our dearest Sunstar editor/teacher usually treats his students to mcDonald's after finals. unfortunately, we were baptized as the very first batch that wasn't given the opportunity. h0ooo0o0ooww bad. sure, it's just mcdonald's but for every maroon who's broke after moolah-spending on projects, anything with a happy meal is a definite treat! But life moves on. Hehe. i think he didn't really like us. we indianed him one time (during cookout friday), we were just talking, eating, texting and doodling through his discussion on libel, AND we outsmarted him when we used a joke he taught us on him.

he said that UPians can easily detect lies because we have our "bullshit alarm" (with a corresponding hands shaking on top of our heads gesture). so when he started talking and picking on his favorite matters (number one fave: USJR), we beat him to the punch line and screamed "bullshit alarm!" Geez, i never saw him laugh as hard. That's our batch for you, Sir Siares! One older mass comm student who had to retake the subject was even surprised on how brave we are with him and that her batch never had the guts to joke around his presence. hmmm, i love my batch.

anyway, for our finals in comm120, my friends and i had an overnight study again. chai and i only slept for an hour. cool. well, i was able to answer. that definitely paid off.

Over-all: i have to say that the semester that just passed by was the most difficult. the burden just didn't come at the eleventh hour. they started hounding us since the second month of school. thanks to our teachers! and cheers to all the people i've become closer with: tiff, jessa, lyza, jackie, jane, gee, and vera. and to my originally close friends who think "there ain't no mountain high enough that can wait" (hehe sorry, guys!) Bambam, jackie and hera. love you guys!

P.S. one sentence never seemed SOo0o0o0o Lo0o0o0ong!

... Maica and Bennet broke up. But we still love Bennet! Though he still has no plans to get back with Maica, we understand him. she's put him through so much pain already. he can't just invest and invest and get bankrupt at the end.

... someone wrote about "MY Sassy Chic" today and she couldn't have written a more appropriate title, "Fate builds bridges for the one you love." Oh, yeah!

... i'll get back to you later.

Ormoc's High Tide

2004-10-23T15:30:00.000+08:00

Right at this moment, adrenaline is high in Ormoc. Though I'm not directly a part of the events, there's a rush that makes me feel I'm really a part of it. After all, I'm in Ormoc; and I'm an Ormocanon.

First, there's the Christening of the baby boy of my brother's 18-year-old classmate (back in high school). Although shame is immediately connected to teen pregnancy, Cheska looks pretty confident, happy and proud. For me, that compensates the situation. Besides, what will matter in the future is not whether he was born out of wedlock or not; but how he will be cared, loved, and raised.

And guess who I saw during the after-ceremony party? Dean! Could I possibly still have a crush on him? Ummm... I can't tell but I kind of regretted that I didn't greet him.

Second is the wedding of the daughter of one of the most affluent Chinese families in the city.

Third and fourth are the Terry Larrazabal Mountain Biking Competition and Tito Mackoy's Motor Bike Racing Competition that have drawn hundreds of enthusiasts from around the nation. Thus, the place to be in now is at our alternative "mall" to Gaisano, the Ormoc Centrum, where the registration is parked. Isn't it cool? Ormoc has become a destination for such sports competitions and people are actually arriving for it (not to mention, all the tisoys!). And for this, I'm SO proud. Lucy Torres-Gomez can now take a rest from being Ormoc's only claim to fame. We're finally in the map! (Hehe!)

Fifth is the anniversary of chapter installation of the Brotherhood of Christian Businessmen and Professionals.

Sixth is the concert of Pops Fernandez, Jay-R and Jimmy Bondoc. I'm not exactly a fan but for the sake of the concert's cause (Gawad Kalinga), what harm will attending the event bring? It's pretty funny because people flocked to tita Daisy's house where the luncheon for the guests took place. I guess my ka-jologs is taking a rest now because I didn't bite at tita Daisy's offer to be a waitress. ;)

All that and possibly more weddings, birthdays, Christenings and competitions that I don't know of. But one thing's clear here: Ormoc is wide awake!

P.S. Tita Verna won fourth in the women's category of the mountain biking competition. Wooohooo! It was pretty sad because a female Philippine Team member, while going down a slope, broke her collarbone after she lost control of her bike. Tito Rex also won in another category. According to tio Perok, in his category, tito Rex only had one competition, and a female at that. But then again, that's according to tio Perok. Hehe, sowee tio.

Attack of the Marco

2004-10-21T12:00:00.000+08:00

He's Marco Lobregat, period.

For 5 long years, I've crushed on a model/Atenean named Marco. This is a big surprise considering that I'm fickle and I have thousands of crushes that don't last really long in my list. But with Marco, he lasted for 5 lo0o0ong years. If you see the guys I've admired and still admire since I stepped in the University of the Philippines, Cebu College, you'll also be very surprised to know that I actually had a crush on him. He's a dashing mestizo with a clean cut and refined and conventional ways; very contradicting to the rugged, long-haired, non-conventional guys I'm crushing on nowadays who are either an artist, a musician or both.

Although I don't really admire Marco (and the likes of him) anymore, I still check on his articles at Philippine Star (not that he's a very good writer)and look for websites with information about him. Just recently, I read that he's already based in Spain. And by reading his articles, I figured that my dream guy has gone from "beyond looks" to "just looks". Sigh. My crush affair with Marco Lobregat is finally approaching an end.

But on a certain Marco Garcia, it has just began.

Not just another Marco.

Ok, that sounded too OA. But since I met Bennet's cousins for the first time, he's the one I've always eyed on because he wasn't as noisy as his other cousins (i.e. Gary and Sydney Uy), and he had sparkling eyes, a dashing nose and a gorgeous smile and not to mention, a mysterious aura.

But he never was as big deal to me as my other crushes. I only remember that I actually have a crush on him when we see each other and a few days after that. Even the wonders of the short conversation I had with him during Jimmy Bondoc's show at the Village didn't really last. But I seriously liked him ever since. He wasn't too rowdy or loud; he didn't try to grab anybody's attention. Mystery seemed to hound him and he just kept to himself most of the time. He seemed to be always on a thinking mode. I guess he really got me because among all my crushes now, he's the only non long-haired guy. It's a funny fact, indeed.

The final draw had to be last Saturday, October 16, 2004, during his sister Lializ'es debut at the new Casiño Español. You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off you. Seriously. He was really dashing in his slacks and blue polo shirt. I was really smittened that not even Iana's news that he already has a girlfriend didn't faze me a bit. Promise. Finally, my sisters think I still have a good taste. Tsk. Tsk.

I really like him, blogs. And if the only memories I'll ever have of him are the way he looked that night and his grip on my hand when he said goodbye at Vudu, then I'll definitely keep them as treasures in my mind where they'll only ever be since my camera wasn't able to tag along that night. Darn.

Speaking of the debut...

Lializ was at her prettiest in a silky white ball gown, with pink lace and pink tela at the bottom. Her escort was none other Andre in a coat and tie. It's quite hard to describe how cute he was but he really took his part seriously to the hilt. Anyway, the venue was simple yet intimately small. There weren't too many decorations except for the ballooned gazebo-like in the middle of the social hall and the very small sparkling paper stars spread over the tabletops. The food wasn't too grand either but I forgive Casiño Español for that since they just opened up anyway.

I was just a seat away Bennet's nephew whom I found cute the first time I saw him during Alex Reyes' birthday. He was weirdly funny. Like me, he was playingly collecting the minute paper stars in a pile. He also sang along to "Can't take my eyes off you" and at one long time, stood beside the dessert table picking on the finger foods. His name is Kyle by the way and I'm just amused by his childish ways.

The program proper was slightly unconventional. Though they had the usual 18 candles and 18 treasures (surefire way to get 18 gifts... tsk.), the 18 roses were given by Lializ'es nephews and nieces whom she's close with. Her father and "twin" brother also danced with her but the one who took the last dance wasn’t even her boyfriend (who was present in white sneakers... wha?), but Jobencio! Tio Perok set him up as a surprise guest and it was pretty funny because a little after Joevince started dancing with Lializ, her uber funny and cool sister, Ria, invaded the center stage and took over the place of Lializ. That definitely sealed the intimate atmosphere of the event. But it should really have been Joefrance since he was the one Lializ has a crush on daw.

After the program, dancing and drinking pursued. Iana and I originally planned to go home right after (since Carlyn was waiting for us) but we opted to stay at the party with Joefrance, Bennet, his cousins and the free drinks. Carla joined us later on. I really had fun. And if I did "something" un-IVI-ish, I couldn't really regret it because I felt I deserved it after drowning myself academically over the past 3 weeks (and the past sem at that!). Though I have to say that I felt quite out of place since we weren't really part of the family. Not that they made us feel that way. Bennet's cousins are among the coolest and funniest to be with.

Speaking of this "something", I grabbed Gary a.k.a. Iana's crush to dance. And take note, I wasn't drunk at that time. (I just really wanted to dance.) I just took in 2 shots of San Mig Light (Yeah, I drank San Mig Light with the shot glass). Tequila is definitely gone in my "drink to get drunk" list. I believe the extra energy I had later that night was my never absent "non-alcoholic drunkenness pass midnight". I'm thankful for that because I don't have to get drunk to boost my confidence.

When the other guys decided to troop to Vudu, we tagged along. But as expected, we just sat there the whole night, talking, teasing, making jokes, looking at people and gushing on the hotties. There was this one guy Iana, Carla and I were crushing on. When he passed by, Bennet pretended he knew him and greeted him. Surprisingly, the guy greeted back. That was pretty funny and another proof to Bennet's craziness. Sydney was also teasing me to his brother that night just because I accidentally called him Gary. Wha? Really, Sydney and I only get along when it comes to teasing. Speaking of getting along, Carla and Joefrance really got along. Hmmm... I can smell a budding team-up. Joseph of SCQ Reload also amused at that night. He was REALLY cute. How he is in the show is just how he is in the flesh. But he doesn't look out of place at all. Kering, keri. Another darn moment for not bringing my camera. We really laughed when Bennet's cousins kept on referring him as Joross. But the big laugh has to be when Ria and her companions requested Joseph to get out of the car to have a photo opt with him. (They were on their way to the Casino and he was on his way home with his Cebu friends). We ended the night (or morning) at 5 a.m. the next day. But before that, Bennet, Joefrance, Carla, Iana and I danced. Whew. What a way to end the grueling semester.

...

Marco, his sister and their friends went home ahead but he dropped by our table beforehand. He gave Iana a peck and reached out to shake my hand (since I was sitting quite far from where he was standing). My heart really jumped, blog. I seriously like this guy and it might be pretty hard to forget that image of the debutante's moreno "twin brother" in black slacks, blue polo, and a glass of wine entwined in his fingers. He's totally swept me off my feet.

...

Hmmm... Could it be that the name Marco really has something going on for me? But to be honest with you, it's really hard to be crushing on guys like these, knowing that that's what they'll only ever be -- crushes -- and this is what it will only ever be -- me looking and them not knowing.

A Crush Affair with Long hairs and Emotions for Mr. Piggy's Miserable Life

2004-10-04T22:00:00.000+08:00

I'm in an autograph mode again! This time, I filled the profile sheet I originally made for Cheryl Tiu. It's not really long but as you will see at the "Describe yourself" portion, I've written SO MUCH about me. You can call it conceit but it's my blog anyway ;) I just want to get some message through.

...
PROFILE SHEET

Complete name: Maria Vita Tan Rodriguez
Nickname: Ivi
Birthday: August 29, 1985
School: University of the Philippines, Cebu College (Mass Communications)

Interests: doing craftworks, dreaming, listening to music, writing, playing the computer, going to the beach, swimming, hanging out with my family and friends, reading, taking and collecting pictures, watching movies on TV, eating, playing the violin, exercising (daw)

Favorite reads: memoirs of a geisha, outsiders, diary of anne frank, angela's ashes, 'tis, teenage textbook and workbook, biographies (especially the one of Martin Luther King Jr.), TIME magazine, Youngblood, Youngstar, 2bu, Super

Music: U2, sting, REM, eraserheads, sugarfree, jason mraz, yellowcard, sarah brightman, Norah jones, sarah mclachlan, paolo santos, chantal kreviazuk, lisa loeb, dave matthews band, the cure, googoo dolls, gin blossoms, Alicia keys, Cynthia Alexandre, barbie's cradle, mojofly, rivermaya, orange and lemons, johanne pachelbel

Shows/movies: amazing race, the simpsons, hiram, fear factor, gilmore girls, Oprah, boston public, wazzup, wazzup, breakfast, the ashlee simpson show, newlyweds, bubble gang, several shows at the ETC channel // patch adams, little women, the other sister, now and then, beaches, the last samurai, the story of anne frank, stepmom, heaven and earth, land before time I, all dogs go to heaven (original), the italian job, anna and the king, my bestfriend's wedding, bring it on, tears of the sun, 50 first dates and many movies of adam sandler, robin williams, brendan fraser, meg ryan, and several HBO movies and independent films showed at the Hallmark channel, and movies that depict history (specifically those that tackle on apartheid, oppression, genocide... they frighten and gross me out but I learn a lot)

Describe yourself: I'm forever a planner and dreamer but rarely a doer; I'm indecisive, confusing, and sometimes obsessive compulsive; I'm a double checker; a BIG, Big, big part of my day is dedicated to eating; I prefer things organized but if they start messing up, I just let it be; I'm kind of freakish, paranoid, "nerbiyosa," ideologically optimistic but mentally pessimistic (hope this makes sense); I'm boring according to my sister, a loud mouth according to my friends, talkative to many people I'm comfortable with, a wallflower to people I'm not at ease with; for some reason, I'm not comfortable around guys and in a large crowd; I love getting drunk; my mind is a bottomless pit of both sane and crazy imaginations; I have a penchant for collecting second-hand books, shells, sand, stones of places I think I wouldn't be able to go back to, and memorabilia of events I'd want to remember; I'm very fond of creating names and making a life out of them (most of my compositions are of this sort); I'm keen in learning more about what's making activists and nationalists who they are (yeah, even the imperialist in me); I'm fond of long-haired guys who are hounded by mystery (and it's a double plus if he's a musician or an artist); I'm very thrifty but when I fall in love with one thing, I'd spend thousands for it; I love blogging, I have a passion for the sound of the violin (but close to none for playing the instrument) and orchestra, I love my moments of "solitude" at my grandma's beach house in ormoc, I love my digi cam, my dog chinchin, my journals, and on top of them all, my family; I'm dying to learn more (through magazines, news dailies, movies, TV shows); I love doing craftworks and starting stories but I tend to be very lazy when it comes to finishing them; I'm very insecure and forever lacking in confidence and self-esteem; I'm a big scaredy-cat; I would love to be adventuruous and try out many things but most of the time, my fear gets in the way; I dream of living in australia with my dream dogs, a musician with dreads (haha, joke!) and enough money to sustain us, a kid, Bienny and my parents and playing the violin with a band and an orchestra; I'd like to travel around the middle east or any country with strong culture and beliefs and learn more about the part of life I don't know; I'd love to be the right-hand woman of a director for any hollywood film or discovery channel or national geographic show; I'm a frustrated artist, athlete, musician, poet, writer, Olympian; I sometimes think of visiting the therapist; I have the best friends who appreciate me but never the bestfriend; I'm planning to go scuba diving, parasailing, water skiing, working for any production team (preferably for the Olympics, any MTV event and the Oscars), write a book and make a movie that would make a very big impact on people, be thin and eat more than I can and fall in love before I go; I keep 101 crushes (of course I'm exagerrating now but I'm almost there) but I dream of only the one; I'm very unstable and can easily be influenced; I keep two characters -- one when I'm with my friends and another one when I'm with my cousins and family; I'm a kaleidoscope of many indescribable things; most of the time, I don't understand myself

Philosophy in life: Thy Will be done and so everything happens for a reason (at least I think so)

* * *

The last few days in a nutshell...

August 21

... During Samantha's birthday/ "despidida" party, we were introduced to this very free-spirited girl named Magat. Well, she is really one of a kind. She just came from a 5-month trip in Thailand, Nepal and other Buddhist countries with her Swiss bohemian boyfriend. They both met at the now non-existent happenin' place, Mi Vida. Magat was trying to get the attention of another foreigner without realizing that he was with somebody else. Alas she didn't snatch that guy, but she definitelly snagged the attention of the Swiss guy. She's very suprising, that's all.

... That night, tita Mae asked if I want to get matched with her friend's 25-year-old son. I'm really not open to that kind of meeting guys 'cause I don' want to initiate any disappointments. But it seemed so harmless so I just played along. Though it never happened, I just got so amused. Tita Mae thought of me instead of her daughter Carla or my sister Iana because the guy requested for a "simple, walang arte" girl. Cool.

August 28

... On the eve of my birthday, I had dinner with the family on my mother's side. Honestly, I had so much fun just cooking, helping in the preparation and being the celebrant. We also invited Ting's girlfriend Laclac (who's super nice but doesn't talk at all, i.e. no connection) and Leandro's Larissa (I have a heartbreaking news about them) so that Lac wouldn't feel too left out (they're both Sacred Hearters). But anyway, the two of them still didn't bond that night because they stuck to their men. Dickoy and Kino, Ting's best beer buddies, were also there and initiated the drinking (even with the presence of the folks!). By the end of the night, Daniel was laughing like a hyena, Ting was drank, and tita Mae (too shocked with Daniel) drank along. It was pretty fun -- with mama reuniting with her cousins (as expected, their laughter beat that of a whole town during a fiesta -- no exag!) Although I would have wanted to but I didn't get drunk. Good girl.

August 29

... In the afternoon, we shared a pastarrific merienda with the whole paternal family at Don Henrico's. Yum! And the company? Yummier!

September 1

... Another realization hit me in the head during our Department of Agriculture visit for Development Communication. I love eating lechon. Just as long as I don't see a pig getting butchered, there's no emotion involved for the animal. But during the visit, we passed by a semi-piggery. One really stirred my feelings. He was no longer covered in his normal pink, instead, he was decked in patches of black skin, mostly bruises, wounds and fungus. I knew he had no chance of getting cooked to be eaten. So, basically, he was waiting for his death. I just wondered if that's all there is to a pig's life? Don’t they have another ending aside from the mouths of lechon lovers and the loneliness of waiting for death? It really is a miserable life!

September 25

... A big shock plagued the Mass Comm department (students of other departments, at that) of UP today when word got around of the death of our former teacher, the Albert Martinez-look-a-like crush ng bayan Sir Christopher Misajon. He was already an anchor in GMA Iloilo. He was allegedly been robbed and shot 4 times in his stomach and neighboring intestines with a shot gun. So many questions hound his death. Why would robbers carry around a shot gun in their hunt for victims? Unless it's planned, that is. What was really his relation to the girl he was with at 1 in the morning of his death in a car? How could she have escaped their 4 assailants? There's still no answer to these questions but definitely, justice won't prevail by the capture of the four killers alone. These will only end when the real motive will be revealed. For now, I pray that Sir Chris is at peace.

Just today...

... Rio Locsin died today. I have no relation to her but I deeply feel for her family. We did pass through the same suffering with the death of tita Menching. Though it was relieving that she was finally lifted to a place where no pain could be felt, it was very hard to knock ourselves back to reality. I could just imagine how Rio's very young children feel. I guess the short time of slight recovery she was given by the Lord after her 10-day comatose was a chance to say goodbye to her loved ones. This blessing of the Lord was also given to other cancer patients I read about. Like Patricia Borromeo, for example. For months, she battled it out with the big C. But she survived that phase. She even made a comeback in the magazines. But a little time later, word just got out that she died. Even if it's painful, one just couldn't help but thank God for the chance He's given for the sick and the family to say the last farewell. This brings back the big dilemma I've always thought of: Which is harder? To have a slow death with the sick going through all the suffering while the family, though sad to see their kin in pain, is fine at his mere presence OR a sudden death, wherein the victim doesn't go through any pain but would put the family in such a shocking grief?

... I heard Maica and Bennet broke up. WHAT? Yup, they did. Just a little after Bennet finished his BAR examinations. Just a little after Maica took her Medical Technologist oath. I don't know what to feel but I'm glad Maica garnered enough courage to break it to Bennet since she isn't really ready for Bennet's next agenda: marriage. Though it's really sad that Bennet has to go through such a heartbreak (at 36, at that), it's good that Maica decided to be fair with him. At least, he didn't let him wait for nothing. Honestly, I have nothing against Bennet. For me, he'd make a perfect groom for my sister. He's very nice, he's very friendly and I know he loves my sister. But my sister is only 22. They've actually broken up before for the same reason. I hope that the time will come when the final destiny for these two will be realized: either with each other or with somebody else.

Un dated memories...

... Leandro broke up with his very lovely girlfriend, Larissa because "they're too young". If that's the case, why did he allow to let their relationship last 4 years long? I understand Leandro and I think it was a smart move. Who in his proper mind would break up with somebody as beautiful (think Chinese Mestiza, think Diana Van Walsum), as nice (really nice), and as down-to-earth as Larissa, anyway? Let's just see who'll come running back. Time will tell.

... My best BC 130 memories definitely do not include anything Leal in it. (haha, rude) In fairness, she's a nice person. But as a teacher, well, she's pretty good. But I just don't get her (for indescribable reasons, you hear?). Now, she's saying that she would want to make the most out of her last days with us. Gosh, if she only knows how excited the whole class is for that last day. (Hehe). Anyway, if I'd have something to remember BC 130 by, it would definitely be my semestal project groupmates: the leader Sheela Farinas, the Ms. Reason-able Emerald Longcop, the funny but tough duo Tiffany Arranguez and Jessa Agua , the tough and big laugh-er Lyza Roa, and the silent but brilliant Celeste dela Cruz. We've spent lunch dates with each other, slight arguments, long and lazy meetings, SO MUCH laughter, hot tempers, sleepless overnights (and we did a 6-pm to 6-am twice!) and a weird bond of our very different characters. I'm gonna miss these guys. And we weren't able to take the souvenir shots!

... Officially, today (October 04), we're done with Dev Comm and BC 130. Though I'm not 100% sure of a passing, I'm very assuming so I'm expecting a 3 or above grade for both! Wheeeee!

... I recently attended a very intimate poetry reading session at this very intimate art place, Lumad Numad (oooOps, I think I got it wrong again. Before, I referred to it as Lumpia, Lumpia). Anyway, I didn't feel like I belong there because the people were so nationalistic. It's not that I have no drop of nationalistic blood left in me anymore but for one who once asked an activist what could possibly be wrong with an American invasion, I don't think we're talking about so much blood, either. Anyway, it was quite embarrassing to be seen there by John Su (the activist I was referring to). But on the other hand, it was a nice gathering and I loved it because there was no fuss. Everything was laid back. I'd rather be decked in the simple jeans and shirt ensemble, ride the jeep to Mandaue, listen to people read poetry and sing music than spend an hour in the dressing room, drive to Vudu and spend hundreds to just talk, look at people and listen to dumb music. I loved the people, too -- as no fuss as no fuss could be. And it helped I spotted another long-haired cutie who reminded me of Egay. (Tsk, kidding. He happens to be Jessa's admirer.) The theme for that night was Martial Law and as if to knock me back to where I belong, poems against imperialism were read. Tsk. Ok, let me get this straight. I'm a big fan of anything Filipino. But at the same time, I also appreciate anything foreign. Not completely. Not as much, maybe. But at this very moment, I'm listening to a compilation of the hits of E-heads. And just a while ago, I drowned myself with Barbie's Cradle. I am a Filipino. See.

... I'm not sure if I should be writing this. After all, no crushing moment stays with me for too long. But for memories' sake, ok. Before I spell out the magic name this time, let me just tell you of a very funny observation -- all my current crushes have long hairs. What is this all about? Is long hair really a prerequisite to me? Ok. His name is Berto and he's another Fine Ats student. He's a musician, a soccer player and a social activist and artist. Tiff says he's not really attractive but I guess I got drawn to him for reasons outside the physical aspect. Ok, he's got long hair. (Tsk.) He's a no fuss guy, that's why. Mystery hounds him, too. I know I have profound reasons for my crushing on "profound" and "uncrushable" guys. I just wonder if I have that same charisma to people. Am I profound? Or plain shallow? I could not tell. Maybe this is just my cure to get that I-hate-school spirit off and have somebody I could look forward to seeing. Char.

... September wouldn't be completely covered if I just missed on the Intrams. SOON.

mentally an Olympian; physically not

2004-09-20T22:00:00.000+08:00

The Olympics fever hit me pretty hard this year that up to now, more than a month after the world's greatest sports stage came to a close, I still unconsciously tune into to NBN Channel 4 where the games were shown during the event's lifespan of two weeks. And I can't believe it only takes place every four years. That's just sad. There's that wonderful rush that overcomes you when you watch the games and listen to the official Olympic anthem for the awardings fill up the stadiums. I guess this was the same rush that prompted me to hoot for other countries, as well. See, that's the true essence of humanity -- appreciating the strengths of other nations and accepting the weaknesses of some (or most). I hope we could always celebrate humanity.

Oh yeah, please be reminded that these are just the views of a certified Olympic couch potato who set aside her academic responsibilities to join the biggest celebration of human abilities via the tube. (Of course, that didn't include missing my classes. Let's just say that working on my homeworks and reading for discussions were reserved on the last hour prior to class. Well, what's new? Procrastination is the way to go these days.)

... One of the reasons that I had my eyes dedicatingly glued to the screen during the amazingly grand and spectacular yet dragging Olympic Opening was the firework display. I think I would have easily broken my tough facade and bring out the baby in me who just adores and yearns for multi-colored manmade thousand comets displays across the skies (and that's how I put it). If Beijing assures me of a greater display, I assure them with a presence at the 2008 Games. And that's mine. (ambitiousa!)

The fireworks display at the opening and the closing are beyond any description. And they gave me the best hangover of all.

Swimming was the first sport I feasted my eyes on and Miguel Molina was the first Filipino I saw compete. That wasn't an unforgettable start however as he finished last in his 400m heat at the pre-elimination round. Then came Miguel Mendoza. Even though he had a devastating end at the 2004 Games, I saw him win his first 400m heat and for me, that was just terrific. And he is also an eyecandy. Tsk.

Speaking of Miguel Molina -- he holds a national record in breaststroke after breaking the record of another swimmer (duh, of course he had to break someone else's record). But that's beside the punch statement! Guess who used to hold this breaststroke swimming national record that Miguel Molina broke? Well, it's crazy that he never talked about it. It's Jonas Panerio -- the Junas in my phonebook, the star swimmer in UP Cebu, the ex of many girls (hehe, sorry Junas), the almost walang paki guy, the...! If Iana's swimmer friend didn't mention it, I wouldn't have known. And when I confirmed it from Jonas, he even hesitated to admit it. Ooooh... Unfortunately, he stopped swimming (and even confessed to gaining extra flubs now) and said that if you don't have the passion, it would never work since it's really tiring. In his own words, "he never had a childhood" because of swimming. Well, I wouldn't care just as long as I get to swim along Grant Hackett or Jenny Thompson. Hehe.

But I think I understand him. In an attempt to start my Olympic career, I tried to swim past the 10-meters(more or less)--wide, 4-feet-deep pool of tito bingcol back and forth and only managed half a round. It's just so tiring. I could just imagine how sore the bodies of those who compete at the 1500m get. Maybe I should ask the Aussie hottie Grant Hackett who bagged the 1500m gold (yes, it's not just Ian Thorpe). Hehe. Going back to my dream Olympic career, there's always taekwondo.

Ok, maybe I shouldn't pick on Ian Thorpe. I now know why he's getting all the praises. This guy really has the swimmer's arms and feet. In one competition, he was really swimming behind during the first 50 meters or so but in the last few meters before the finish, he quickened his pace, swam past his opponents and bagged a medal. That was really a race to behold since in many swimming competitions, the one who leads during most part of the race is the one who wins. But in that particular competition, Ian changed the norms. Awesome.

I also got to feast much on track and field, gymnastics and taekwondo.

...I remember that Canadian who held very good titles from other international hurdle competition but when the trigger was pulled for that particular race at the Athens Games, she stumbled in the first hurdle and even involved the Russian who ran beside her. That was really a heart-wrenching sight -- her being a champion in defeat and in sorrow and in full view to the thousands of spectators and the Russian's race that started well yet ending in a big failure that wasn't hers. I would have gotten into a catfight. I mean, working for four years to get there only to be pulled down along by a reckless (I guess) Canadian? Where's the Olympic Spirit, Iv?

... One of the events that I really enjoyed watching and fortunate enough to catch on TV was the group competition in gymnastics. For a crazy reason, I kind of developed a sense of envy for those young girls there. I think they're barely through their teenhood yet they have already performed at the world's greatest sports stage. But I guess the price is the burden of meeting their nations' expectations. Well, bring it on! Those girls made me add another "why" question to my mother -- why didn't you spank me with a belt when I decided to quit ballet? Tsk.

Since timing wasn't in favor of me watching one of my most favorite events, which is artistic gymnastics, I just fed on basketball, volleyball, judo and taekwondo. Judo is really not my piece of cake. I'm sorry if I made wrong observations but to me, it's just like wrestling, but the elite class. I enjoyed taekwondo, however, and even more when I saw 2 Filipinos competing in it.

Honestly, it was a dismay that Antonette Rivera didn't bring home any medal even though she came closest to it but having seen her fight through and win twice was already a blessing to me. My excitement level was so high that I felt like I was at the stadium where she was fighting, more so, I was the one who just won an Olympic taekwondo match! She made me reconsider my thoughts on Filipinos athletes -- from the underdogs to possible gold medalists (yeah, I'm very guilty of this). Donald Geisler did me proud, too, even though he lost on his first fight because I saw him play and I knew he played hard. (Who didn't?)

I believe that all athletes share the same level of the desire to win, but only the lucky few get to show people how high that desire is. The losers shouldn't be seen as those with the lower level of ability. They're just the considerate souls who fought hard but felt they deserved the top prize less. (Or so I think, but that's WHAT I think.)

So, it's a total shame that the Philippine Sports Commission treated our athletes the way they have treated them. No welcome committee for the taekwondo gins? If I were based in Manila, I wouldn't have hesitated to drive to the airport and bring a banner to welcome them and in my usual starstruck mode, have my picture taken with them. Regardless if they win or not, they just represented our country to the biggest sports event in the world. They unified us all Filipinos (okay, except for those who don't care at all) in anticipation for a big win. They carried our country's name, a third-world country at that, alongside the most powerful countries in the world, on a stage that considered all nations at par with each other. They soaked themselves with sweat, nervousness, anxieties and excitement -- all for the glory of the country. And what do they get in return? DEDMA.

Okay, I’m over acting. I even wonder if I'm making sense here at all. What I'm just trying to say is that we need to change our perception of success. We shouldn't measure this according to how many medals our team has brought home. Maybe that's too big a task since we're talking about a culture that sees success as only winning. Well, yeah, where's success in losing? But trying and doing the best? That's a success. Even more when you get to try and do your best at the world's biggest sports event. It's just a shame that our sports commissioners only are too hungry for those gold, silver or bronze recognitions. Let's see how fast they could drive to the airports when our taekwondo gins or our swimmers finally bring home the bacon.

BTW, I read that the US gold medalist swimmer, Natalie Couglin , is half Filipina and even imagined the prospects of her representing our country in at the 2008 Games. LAUGH OUT LOUD. I'm just kidding. I'd even spend on a US citizenship just to represent the States instead of the Philippines when I finally qualify in the taekwondo competition. (Tsk. That's even a wicker reason to laugh out loud.) Really, our country's sports commissioners are very rotten. They couldn't even be grateful for the efforts of our sports heroes.

In my part, I am very grateful not only to Geisler, Rivero, Pangilinan or Mendoza (and the other Filipino athletes), but most of all to the Olympics. It motivated me to dream. And even though it's a crazy and farfetched dream, the act of dreaming alone is a step to progress. And with our country facing fiscal crisis, it's very easy to cave in to the temptations of giving up. Thus, dreaming is such a good thing. Now if only we work on to realize it.

Music to the Core

2004-09-18T22:30:00.000+08:00

...The Muziklaban Experience

Going back to August 21 , Anya and her boyfriend Patrick invited me to be a part of the production team for the Muziklaban semi-final round in Cebu. And since it smelled like a delicious opportunity -- even without the pay -- of course I grabbed it. Iana, Carla and Bill, who were supposed to join me, backed out on the day before the event so I also thought of doing so but it would be very dyahe because I already committed to Anya and Patrick. Fine. So I went.

After the event, I had no regrets. Here's the rest of the story of September 4:

Thank God and I grabbed the opportunity. Well, the chances of dining and conversing with rockstars, getting a pic with an MTV VJ and being at the production end of a rock concert don't come always right? Add to that, receiving orders from people who were strangers a minute ago. Ok, that's a whole different thing. However, I really enjoyed it. When I arrived at the concert site, I was introduced to the head of the production crew in Cebu -- the guy I referred to as "Kuya Benjie" for a long time before embarrassingly realizing that he was actually "Kuya Blaire". Eeeek!

A little after I arrived (Anya brought me there), the band members from Tacloban, Dumaguete and Iloilo arrived. Suddenly, I was surrounded by dreadlocked guys, cuties, guitars, musical equipments and more dreadlocked guys. Smittened? That's even an understatement. I didn't even care about Iana's warning to watch out for kutos (haha) -- well, not when you have an Ira Cruz-Ricci Gurango photocopy (but in lo0ong dreads) walking in the same ground. Honestly, I almost got into a panic attack -- you know how I am with complete strangers, much more with guys. But don't worry, it's just an abnormal insecurity. Thankfully, I mustered all the confidence I got (as if I have even a bit of it to start with) and worked my butt off.

After a long wait (don't you think I've done too much waiting already? Hehe ;), Kuya Blaire introduced me to ate Julie, one of the main production bosses from Manila, and got to some real job. I segregated the IDs (semi-finalists, security, hosts, judges, production -- of course I got one of that!), made a sequence guide (a disaster, by the way), and checked the script (after Ate Julie commended me for having found some typographical errors). While doing that (and sitted like a queen in a special table at the 2nd floor of the VIP section of Orosia, there was this really cute guy who kept on asking questions. It was obvious that he was very panicky because he already knew the answers to his questions but only wanted to double, double check. Funny guy.

Late in the afternoon, kuya Blaire called me to join the production meeting with the whole staff. It was so real and I never felt so out of place and scared. Haha. I was introduced to ate Richie, another production boss from Manila, as Patrick's OJT (on the job trainee, huh?). Ate Richie was the intimidating, straightforward and the maldita version of the equally serious but nicer Ate Julie. But all the same -- the two REALLY meant business. Though I was very new to everything, at least I got a taste of the Manileños way of working. Sure, I was at the receiving end of the orders -- personal alalay, that is. But to repeat what I said, I really enjoyed it.

After the production meeting, I tagged along ate Richie and ate Julie to their hotel to do some last minute behind-the-stage work. It was around 630 pm already and their hotel wasn't a stone's throw away from the concert site so I was amazed by how cool they were despite that we had to get back before the 9 pm scheduled start of the event. During the ride, I was only silent but was quite entertained by their chit-chat. When you hear two people talk about Eli Buendia's love life like they were part of it or about rockstars who are nice to work with and not nice to work with, you’d know directly that these guys are biggies in the concert production business -- and in Manila. Wow, whee.

Before heading to the hotel, we had an eat-all-you-can feast at a nearby Tong's restaurant. The food was SO super that if I wasn't dining with complete strangers and time wasn't tight, I would have taken 3 rounds of lechon kawali and garlic rice! I was really embarrassed in the beginning because ate Richie didn't introduce me to the guys we were eating with. To think, I ate anonymously with the strangers who were paying for my food! I just said a shy hello and smiled when we arrived and sat at the empty seat. Thankfully, ate Richie did a little later, and the guys were actually friendly and played with my name, especially this guy with the really wicked hairstyle (bald on the sides, and a really long cut in the center). I was totally clueless (at that time) that the guys I just had dinner with were music producers for bands like Sandwich, Imago, Itchyworms, Ciudad Chicosci, Wolfgang and Greyhoundz and band members of Razorback, Pinikpikan, and Cynthia Alexandre. (How COOL!)

Right after dinner, we walked to the nearby hotel and met up with some members of Sandwich (well, except for Marc Abaya. Hmph.) We quickly got to the room of ate Julie and ate Richie. While I scribbled away in the certificates for the event participants, the two freshened up. It was really pressuring because we were running late. Ate Richie didn't go back to Orosia with us, however, because she got into a fight with one of the concert's production boss. Wow, after seeing her totally in control, she just backed out.

It was past 830 when we got ready to go back to Orosia but we still had to wait for the judges and the host of the event (the guys who I dined with). While waiting inside the van, Kevin Roy (the guy with the wicked hairstyle) sat in front of me and we had a little chitchat. Of course, your lola didn't know she was talking to the frontman of Razorback. In fairness, he was really nice, friendly and sweet enough to get into a musical conversation with a total ignoramus that I couldn't believe he's a rockstar. I repeat, never stereotype people. Meet them first. We talked about Bamboo, Rico Blanco, hard rock, metal, and so many other things. I was really starstruck. You know, it doesn't really matter who specifically you're talking to; what matters is what he is. (At least, that's how I see it. Tsk.)

On the ride back to Orosia, the musical biggies from Manila were with us in the van and they were talking about -- what else? Music. I was quite comfortable already that when they started joking and singing in that annoying style of voice many rockstars do (the one with which you couldn't get anything out of), I just asked them what category of rock that was and they just quipped in their answers. Well, now I know that it's called death metal because after listening to that kind of voice and music, you would just want to die. Finally, I found the answer. Hehe. (See, there's really nothing wrong with driving your curiosity on a higher level.)

Orosia was already a full house when we got in. And for the first time ever, I got in a concert site only with my Production ID swinging in my neck. VIP, I dare say. Cool.

But VIP, my butt. I quickly followed ate Julie at the improvised "backstage" where all the bands were staying (just at the back of the stage, der.) It was quite hectic already because orders were flying in -- make a list of the bands in order of their performances, bring the copies of the names of the bands and the members to the judges, write the official program flow in a large manila paper, get this, get that, write this, write that, etc (sheesh). But believe me, despite all that and Kuya Blaire's slight reprimand ("the program flow in a manila paper is very important!"), I actually loved the pressure and all the work. It brought me to a higher level of energy and I weirdly enjoyed it. It was a primary experience and it was one that would give me a memory worth going all over again. (Char!)

Officially, I was the yaya and associate cue girl of the concert (especially when kuya Blaire almost passed out). I was practically all over the place with 3 instant bosses (ate Julie, kuya Blaire and kuya Den). I reminded them of the next agenda (the next band to perform, contests), wrote additional informations (text voting results) for the hosts to read, get the things needed (since I was the one who knew where they were), gave orders to the runners and well, relish every minute of something I really imagined myself doing. :)

Inspite of all these, I still got to listen to the bands of course. I have to give the most credits to Grapeshot (the Cebu band with the supergirl vocalist who could do a Gwen Stefani one moment and a rastafarian rapper the next), Bahaghari (the reggae band from Iloilo with all the members decked in bahag while rocking the house and brought the audience up on their feet), and Eye-me and the Royal Scavengers (the Tacloban ska and rock band with a rocker chic for a vocalist and trumpets to go with). I also befriended a fellow production crewmember who, upon knowing that I was excited to see Marc Abaya, kept on joking that he was already at the backstage. He also became my official photographer (with my camera, that is). And I didn’t even get his name! Anyway...

One of the most embarrassing things that occurred was definitely when I handed Kevin the update of the text voting results in a paper. He looked at me as if to ask what it was but my mind totally spaced out and I just remained speechless. A split second later, he just took the paper and said, "I got it." Whew! He was already drunk at that moment.

When all the bands finished performing, they started making a fuss for the Sandwich band (hmmm... primadonnas!) so I really thought Marc Abaya was already there. But the announcement of winners was done and the Urban Dub already got on stage to perform yet there was still no glimpse of him. Oh well. Surprise of all surprises -- while standing near the stage and listening to Urbandub, my fellow production member nudged me and pointed behind me. Seated on the chair I sat on a few minutes ago was a slumped Marc Abaya, fully geared in jogging pants and sweater (on that very hot night of September!) and with his legs placed on top of another chair. Needless to say, he was VERY drunk. If I wasn't excited to have a pic taken with him, the first question I would have asked was if he's always THAT drunk when he's about to perform. Good thing I had the reserve of a tact-ful girl – and a production crewmember, at that. My friend pushed me to Marc and out of the force that existed in the inches that separated us (Who am I kidding? Haha! Pa-force, force pa!), I just blurted out to him in English if I could have my pic taken with him. But since he seemed not to have understood me, I just relayed it in Tagalog. Well, drunk as he was, he was rockstar-ish enough to stand up and put up his thumb for the pic. And that's the story on how I got my souvenir shot with VJ Marc Abaya. Starstruck? Well, yes. (Patrick later told me that when he welcomed the band from the airport, Marc was already very intoxicated... Oh, dear.)

After Sandwich performed, I realized it was over and I couldn't believe I just pulled it all off. To think, I almost backed out because nobody was going to be with me. To think, I'm very shy (a personal claim that many people don't agree with), very panicky, and sometimes very tanga. To think, it was my first. And to end it all, ate Julie and kuya Blaire really commended me in front of Patrick for my work. WHAT? Whoo whee! I love those guys! To add to that, they got my number! For possible re-hiring next time, I guess? Hehe, well, I just love the work!

Before I left, ate Julie told me to wait for a while and later, handed me P800! To think, it wasn't part of the deal. Did I really worked my butt off that much? Well, I didn't expect that but it didn't hurt anyway. Really, with or without P800, the wonderful experience I had wouldn't have changed. All I could say is, "Cool! I got paid for something I totally enjoyed doing!" Post: that was my official 2nd paycheck, next to Sunstar's P500.

For the first time in that event (well, actually, it was already around 3 am when we went home), Anya and I met up. It was quite embarrassing because she was the one who brought me there (Patrick insisted she didn't take part in the production because it was very hot... awww...) but I wasn't able to hang out with her during the whole concert (feeling busy? Tihi.). I'm forever grateful.

On the way to the San Mig Factory (where Patrick parked his car), I was seated beside this VERY cute guy who I first saw during the announcement of winners (ooooh, love at first sight? Haha, on my part!). Well, despite his presence, I was really unabashedly blabbing the ride away. (Yeah, on those wee hours of the morning, I was still up and away!) We weren't introduced yet but when I got in Patrick's car (since Patrick is from V. Rama, he was the one who brought me home while Anya went on the other way) with the cutie, Patrick introduced me to him -- the Associate Brand Manager of Red Horse Beer from Manila (shucks, I forgot his name). Ok, that was the most striking moment of the night. He was JUST SO CUTE. Think of a Marco Lobregat with the Chinese eyes. Think of Atom Araullo, tisoy version. Sigh. He was gentlemanly enough to shake hands with me (haha, of course, that was a blessing!) .

During the ride, he told me that the "ate Julie" I was blabbing about (my boss for the night!) was the very "Julie"that inspired Eraserhead's hit, "Julie Tearjerkie." Whopa! Cool. I asked if ate Julie had a "relationship" with any of the E-heads and he said that she was just maiyakin. Wow, in an instant, I became very friendly and learned so many. See.

I'm sure there were many things that deserved to be mentioned here (yeah, blame it on my memory) but I guess I drowned you with enough Muziklaban experience already. That was really one great time. And the biggest lesson of all -- grab any opportunity, you'll never know what's right in front of you! Yup, my take on this new experience have definitely surpassed the excitement of the salary I got, the rockstars I met, the nice people I worked with, and the sight of the dreadlocks! Just do it!

And I can't believe I waited for several weeks before writing about this?

... Before heading out to the Orosia, Anya and I talked about starting our own production company with her cousin Joey (a.k.a. Maica's long-time crush). Hehe. I don't think it matters if I'm the boss or just an "OJT," just as long I get to be behind the stage. Bring it right on!

A thousand words in several pictures

2004-09-12T12:00:00.000+08:00

Pictures paint a thousand words... does this mean I can get away with not writing about some cool events that have occurred in August and September? Hehe, smart ass! Hope you'll have enough patience to wait until this personal slacking leaves me. 'Til then... settle with the pics. (They're pretty cool, too!)

--> SPECIAL: (August 12) PBA players conquered UP! Not that the maroons were too excited about it. Honestly, if Wesley Gonzales, Paul Artadi, Rich Alvarez, Mike Cortez, Renren Ritualo and Enrico Villanueva didn't descend from those huge buses, I wouldn't have cared at all. Okay, they weren't exactly PBA superstars, but they were my UAAP superstars.

I also got pictures from Sam's birthday, my birthday, the Muziklaban experience and the cutie Japanese exhange student John hosted to last August. Shamefully, I'm yet to write about them. Ok, it's my bad. Anyhow, enjoy!

2004-09-12T00:11:00.000+08:00

Va-va-voom! Walking into tito Bingcol's new backyard is like walking into a resort. But alas! I have my monthly visitor. Oh darn!

2004-09-12T00:10:00.000+08:00

I have never been surrounded by so many musicians (and some in dreads at that!). Needless to say, I was starstruck! Aside from the dreadlocked Ira Cruz/Ricci Gurango look-a-like, this guy is a prize find-- none other than Marc Abaya. Geez, I wonder if he's always as drunk as he was that night whenever he's about to perform. Nevertheless, he still rocked hard that night... and well. And he was sweet enough to stand for this souvenir pic! Tsk.

2004-09-12T00:07:00.000+08:00

The guy in brown singing his heart out is Kevin Roy, one of the night's hosts and Razorback's front man. For a rockstar, he was quite nice and friendly. I just hope I didn't sound like a total ignorant during our little chitchat during the show. The guy fully geared in a jogging pants and sweater (and bending) is Marc Abaya, ready to rock on.

2004-09-12T00:05:00.000+08:00

The Muziklaban experience! Thanks to these fellows -- I had so much fun! (standing, l t r) That's Kuya Blaire, the head of the Cebu production crew; Patrick, Anya's boyfriend who got me there; me and (sitting) ate Julie, my main "boss" (oooh, that sounds so professional!) and one of the head organizers of the whole event from Manila. And the biggest chi of all: she's the inspiration of Eraserhead's Julie Tearjerkie. (Thanks to the info given by the cutest Associate brand manager of Red Horse Beer from Manila... teehee)

2004-09-12T00:03:00.000+08:00

The Japanese are taught never to refuse anything, much more a souvenir shot! He was just fortunate (or unfortunate) that he's being hosted by a family with a big extended family who ADORES food. And the dinner that night to formally welcome him was enough proof. Foodabonga! There's Kenzo, tita Didang in Cheongsam (tita, he's a Jap, not a Chinoy! Hehe), Jiggy, Maica, Joefrance, Iana, Ting, Me, (seated) Anya, Melissa, John and the guest of honor, Hiroki.

2004-09-12T00:02:00.001+08:00

The line-up: (standing, l to r) Celeste, Geraldine, Bambam, Vera, Lourjamine, Hera Shan, Me (sitting, l to r) Bern, Jane, Jackie, Lyza, Tiffany and Jessa.

2004-09-12T00:02:00.000+08:00

Like what I told Ida, the only love affair I'm welcoming now is with food. (Hehe, sulker!) So it was just fitting that I treated my closest college buddies to a lunchdate with gluttony (hehe, kidding) at the heavenly Eat-all-you-can haven that is the Royal Concourse. Here's to my 18th, 19th, and 20th birthday!

2004-09-11T23:57:00.000+08:00

What's a birthday without the booze? Haha! For the first time, Ting got drank in the presence of our folks -- not to mention, Daniel who was laughing the night away! Here's the rest of the gang (with me, all sober and always the photographer) Anya, Maica, Ting, Daniel, Iana, Kino, Rica, Dickoy, Bill and Carla. Not bad; that was one of my sweetest welcome to a new personal year. (Thanks to dearest poppy and mother) The next afternoon, we treated the other side of the family (father's side) to a pastarienda at Don Hen. Yum!

2004-09-11T23:55:00.000+08:00

Smile! Laclac, Ting, Dickoy, Iana, Bien, Me and Kino.

2004-09-11T23:54:00.000+08:00

(August 28) It's my 19th -- whee! Here are the guys who helped me welcome my 19th year with a bang -- (standing, l to r) Me, Maica, Ting and his ladylove Laclac (sitting, l to r) Iana, Anya, Jason, Mica, Carla, Bill, Leandro and his ladylove Larissa. It's an intimate family affair. Awww...

2004-09-11T23:53:00.000+08:00

(August 21) All glammed up for Sam's 24th birthday! Sam specially told us to be (well) all glammed up since the party doubled as her "despedida" party since she's never gonna get married anyway (daw!) If you're wondering why such a gorgeous gal can't get the right guy, well... just have a one on one session with her. (hehe, kidding Sam) Anyway, that's the very surprising Magat, the birthday girl Samantha, Maica, Iana, Ting, Carla (in the floor) ME and daniel.

2004-09-11T23:52:00.000+08:00

As far as I could remember, Rich was my first official crush in UAAP -- and he was still a sophie at that time! So when I saw him walking inside our campus, I became an instant jologs. Of course noh! Who goes home with the pics anyway?

2004-09-11T23:50:00.000+08:00

(August 13) Oh yeah, I have one Cookout pic to show! That's me and Narsh with our last minute works of art, Ash and Au. Around the time Neil texted that the rampahan was about to start, I was still sticking paper money to Au's skirt! But I'm proud of these guys. For froshies, they were already flooded with guts!

2004-09-11T23:45:00.000+08:00

Wild Wes and me! Chika alert: this guy texted my friend!! Well, for a while... 5 days after Wes saw hera and asked for her number (during the PBA Campus tour in UP), hera lost her phone and lost contact with him. Aww... Ateneo's former crush ng bayan crushes on my sweet and pretty, pretty friend.

2004-09-11T23:44:00.000+08:00

I was itching to ask Mike how he feels being around the guy who "stole" his UAAP MVP award. Thankfully, I just kept my mouth shut. Renren was nice and humble, Mike had some arrogance going on. Oh, well.

2004-09-11T23:43:00.000+08:00

Magazine and TV don't give Enrico justice. He's WAY cuter in person. Surprisingly, even cuter than Rich and the rest! EeeEeEEeee!

2004-09-11T23:42:00.000+08:00

Ok, I'm a proud maroon, but I loved the Blue Eagles -- since way back the time of Paul Tanchi and Rich Alvarez was still a rookie. Anyway, that's Enrico Villanueva and Rich Alvarez, up close.

It's all about the thrill

2004-09-02T23:00:00.000+08:00

nothing beats sitting in front of the computer after a lo0o0o0o0ong day -- exam in journ 104 (editing -- no sweat! It would be TOTALly shameful if i fail; at the same time, no surprise since i just went through the sentences and paragraphs and imagined i was editing them), grueling and mind-boggling exam in economics (and i mean... it really killed me! no amount of memorization could have helped. you REALLY needed to take everything in by heart... and maybe, by soul), an exhausting Prom meeting (with more than half of the committee members a no-show; with a Kirby Nabong who ALWAYS wanted to be heard -- if it weren't for Dom, the near empty meet would have ended with no saving grace... OOooH, much thanks for gays! :D) and a long walk from UP Lahug to home . i think it was what i needed (not just to add to the already tiring day, but also to make up for the gazillion potato and corn chips i munched on this afternoon. shame! (i hear you)

anyway, like my past few posts that contained more passe entrees than personal current events, this one won't be any different. i know i've been such a slob for not having visited you for almost two weeks (?), but then again, i've really been taking that (slob) role all too seriously now.

i barely even have the "thrill" to study anymore (well, not counting the last two hours before exam time period). i don't think this attitude limits itself to just studying, but also toward school. (or was i naturally born a lazy bone?) in fact, while answering my journ 104 exam this morning, i dozed off (we all can relate -> lack of sleep) and lost track of time. when i woke up suddenly, i thought it was already my favorite time of the day, 4pm, end of classes. so much for dreaming.

anyway, i was in for a BIG, BIG surprise this afternoon. i even think it saved me from going under a nervous breakdown (ok, that would be exaggerating) after trying to squeeze in thousands of economic logic into my mind for the exam (i know you know i'm loathing... indeed!). while sitting at the lib, ate Ems passed by and mentioned that she read my name at the national daily, Philippine Star. while agonizing over what my name was doing THERE (did i win something? was someone looking for me? hehe), she mumbled that it was something about "rock, rock". Oh, golly! Igan d'Bayan wrote about my request (for him to email me the top rock albums and artists since 2000 for my report in BC 130... the email alone sent me all giddy up!) -- right THERE! But more than seeing my name in that paper, i got SO thrilled because one of my favorite writers included me in his articles. EeeeeeeeeEE! i think i got so excited that i allowed okin, my professional library newspaper pages stealer/friend (hehe, sowee oks), to rip off that page instead of settling with a photocopy. and he did! Mama mia! this is so cool. here's to iganja!

ok, going back to my lessening affinity for school... dev. comm. is also playing pressure with me now. we're supposed to produce around 5 communication materials (poster, leaflet, pamphlet, comics, etc.), with each awarding us with only 20 points and to pass this requirement, we need a hundred! Our lovely teacher, Sir Maganaka, is wondering why it's giving us so much pressure. well, it doesn't really help when your agency is expecting us to only propose a comics and a poster and nothing else!

ok, since that pressure hunts me every day, let's not dwell too much on that in my blog. let me cut this introductory crap and go back to way back...

august 13 -> COOKOUT

I'm not sure i had fun, but this had to be the most successful and organized Cookout ever (thanks to the ever hyper chair/former crush Paolo... Ee, i got to talk to him!). anyway, let me just save you from my blabbing and briefly write the moments that made cookout 2004 the COOKOUT it was.

++ It was a lucky job, i guess, that i befriended Ash along the way (tsk) -- dressing up our reps to the Cookout's rampahan! he's such a baby... a charming, adorable and unassuming one (i like! hehe)! i also befriended Au and Lyle (a.k.a. queenie). really, the latter was not really how you'd perceive her to be when you see her walking in campus. she didn't really have the makings of someone so arrogant, so assuming and so womanly. she's just like any college freshie, except that she (used to) sports an orange hair, wears alluring outfits, dates this (kinda old) Jap-looking guy and whattelse? For a very beautiful (think an Egyptian princess) and very tall girl (think supahmodel), it's sad that she's been "abused" already. but anyway, not too much on that. I'm a good girl now; meaning, not too much gossip, please. Tsk.

i was kinda pissed because when Ash and Au strutted their stuff on stage, our costume design description was edited out (read: They didn't read it). i was really pissed.

++ the highlight of the rampahan would have to be dear olive. with so much confidence (that would have made me a total loser, tsk), she first walked on stage with just a panty on and a cloth wrapped around her upper (and fully painted) body. on her second ramp, she left the cloth and walked naked from the tummy up (but still painted). surprise? yes! (duh, she's my journ classmate!) porno? not! All in the name of expressing "the election that was"!

++ i talked to paolo. period. ok, it was already way past 12 and i was talking to Gee when Paolo walked past us to the stage. midnight drunkenness calling (without alcohol.. promise!), i just talked to him and congratulated him for the job superbly done. when i realized i was starting to blab, i just walked away. i didn't want to, but i had to. i got to be satisfied with a few words right? ehehe.

++ "Rock on, Johanne!" i texted. and he did. he and his band, the Julin Pinis performed (i still don't understand their songs, but UPians love them still, anyway) for the Bio pips. while feasting on him (haha, i'm just kidding), bern clicked away with the camera (yeah, hindi masyadong obvious). so what? who gets home with the pictures, anyway? Tsk.

++ finally, i met my cousin Carlyn's Francis. They're pretty cute together ;) maica and i were laughing because we were thinking that if between carlyn and francis, carlyn is the mother and francis is the son, how was it with carlyn and the much kiddy, kiddy raineer (her ex)? She his grandmother and him, her apo? LOL!

:D it was pretty funny (once again)because when we met up with Carlyn (all in her glam self), i was with bern so i jokingly introduced him as my boyfriend. haha. she bought it and screamed, "Finally!" Hmmm... she should have reserved that for the real one. WHERE IS HE?

August 14, Sugarfree LIVE

there's no better treat than hearing the sugarfree rock on with Burnout LIVE! Thanks to the Muziklaban at Baseline. Carlyn and i were supposed to watch a movie but it was too late and the last full shows already started so we just decided to troop to Time Zone and killed our arms (and pockets) with the air hockey (i SO love it -- uh-uh, even if i lost in all the games.. bummer!). right after, we joined iana and her "reunion" with friends Cheska and Tanya (with whom she hasn't hang out with for some time) at East West. not wanting to "intervene" (haha, OA), carlyn and i didn't stay long and rode the taxi to the Muziklaban. FIRST treat: when we were just walking in, i saw my violinist crush walking out. (the one from the Peace Philharmonic Orchestra) Ahhhhhhh! He's got a rock band -- he can't be gay! Tsk. SECOND treat: SUGARFREE. I just love this band. (they're already forgiven for not including HINTAY in that night's repertoire) tsk.

oh yeah, that was my ultimate hangout. thank God for Carlyn... later on, Iana texted from Vudu and said there was so much happening: think Supahstar (SARAH! TIM!) plus some of the PBA players. alex lim, who was a classmate of Wesley gonzales at ateneo, even offered to introduce iana and carla to him. EeeEek! But they passed. WHAT? Ok. if i were there, passing would not have been an option. and we could HAVE had something to talk about: HERA. haha.

++ speaking of hera... would you believe she lost her phone around 5 days after that PBA school visitation? meaning, she's lost contact with wes (since she wasn't able to memorize his num!) being the most kilig friend (about the whole Wes texting thing), i was also the most... disappointed? So bad.

...

i still would really like to write about so many things. on top of it, my short-term love affair with the Athens Olympic games. i feasted on the "world's biggest sports stage" as much as i could. in fact, i would have wanted to dedicate 24 hours to this once-in-four-years "celebrate humanity" event, i just couldn't. (earth to ivi!) After a few days since its finish, i still unconsciously tune in to channel 4 (where the games were shown). and the greatest realization of all? i have to be in one of those great gatherings. (do i hear beijing calling?) Tsk. more than the games, the spirit, the rings, the whole thing... the fireworks... ahhhh.

...

i know i just turned a year older. well... i just turned a year older! more on this when the slob attack leaves me. hehe.

...

it's such a bummer. our very old pentium 2 computer here in cebu (and all the softwares fortunately or unfortunately included) does not allow me to use the new features of blogger.com (like the chance of using another font color, italization, etc.) but i guess when every thing in my head starts to boil of excitement ("Talk about me! Blog about me!"), it doesn't really matter if they're posted in blue (eagles!), green (archers *blech*) or maroon (UP's winning! We're winning! See, angkon dayon! *glum*). They're still gonna be posted anyway, fresh or 10 days or 1 year after.

Back to high school in July

2004-08-14T15:00:00.002+08:00

The July that has been... I really have the strong urge to write about it… even briefly. Maybe it's because the sentiments that came along the events would not be complete [and replenished?] without finding it a place in here or maybe I just want to ward off any ideas that I haven't got anything to write at all. Hmph. I guess that's just it.

-> July 3 & 4, 2004

Stupid ABS-CBN project. No thanks to Ms. Lynnie but we just wasted over 40 pesos and 4 hours just to be entertained by a grumpy (but nevertheless information giving) station manager for 20 minutes (Big applause for radio announcer Randy Jaynar. If it weren't for him, we wouldn't have gotten even a minute at all). We first barged in the ABS-CBN territory on Saturday but no one was available (not even present) to entertain us (oh yeah, if you won't include the friendly guards). We had to go back the next day. Argh.

Aside from getting a primadonna treatment from this queen of all networks, we also got a fit from Ms. Lynnie. "What? I've given you two weeks to do this assignment and you haven't done anything yet?" Yeah, tell that to those lousy secretaries who kept on losing our letters and the pa-presyo biggies.

-> July 4, 2004

Weddings at the Waterfront. Had I known I would be getting many firsts on this day, I would have prepared for it. I had my chance to actually but I just brushed off Joefrance's first invitation to meet and interview Randy Ortiz. I thought he was too drunk to be serious. (Hehe. That was when we met up in Vudu the night before, July 3) But in the morning, while getting bored in ABS-CBN, Joefrance invited me again. And I guess it would be too loser of me to just drop it. So in the afternoon, I gave myself two hours to go over some facts about Randy (aside from that he designed Lucy Torress' bridal wear), prepare the questions, choose my outfit for the interview and drive to the Waterfront. While waiting for our interview originally scheduled at 4:30pm (it took place around 6 already), I treated myself with the last minute preparations -- models and designers strutting around (Raya is thin and primadonna-ish), production crew walking by, and the one that took my breath away (and put me close to tears), the Peace Philharmonic Orchestra practicing. It reminded of many things: practice, practice, practice, vibrato and that cute rugged guy/violinist (shake me, I think I got hit again).
Randy finally arrived around 6:30pm. I thank God he's super nice that my one million times of stammering, wrong grammar and near-breakdown nervousness didn’t matter so much anymore. But I was really struck -- he's the second person I interviewed personally (the first being Bryan Lim). Shortly after the interview, the fashion show started. I was struck again. It was my first live fashion show and the first time I saw models I think I'm already bored seeing in magazines. More than seeing them in the flesh and their gowns, I was awed by how they... modeled. It was really not just walking a long strip of platform! Isabel Roces is truly the winner! But I agree with the critic written about them: that they didn't successfully project the happy Filipina in a terno. Indeed!
By the way, models (well, most of them from my view) have a certain primadonna atmosphere. And how!

-> July 4, 2004

Missing a Sunday Mass for the first time in my life and as for the record (as for today), I haven't confessed yet. And don’t get me wrong -- I terribly regret it. Though I was mesmerized by the interview and the show, it wasn't really worth the ill feeling of missing Sunday mass.

-> Watching Spiderman 2 three times believe it or not, it's the first movie ever that I’ve seen thrice in a theater -- and in all instances, FOR FREE! (that makes it even better!) First was with tita Rina, tio Perok and Andre during the first weekend of its showing (and Ayala was flooded!). The second time was with tita Judy and my cousins on the 2nd weekend (and Ayala was still flooded!). And the third was with Poppy on the 3rd weekend. Whew! I think I got enough Spidey Action for that. But I really wouldn't mind for another dosage. Tsk.

-> July 10, 2004

Mamita's birthday She celebrated it with an oomph at Paradise (yummy food!) with the mestiza gang (the ones who usually join us during family masses at the cemetery) and some family from Ormoc. Well, there's really nothing in the world that could best express how much we appreciate the greatest grandmother!

-> Kakapal ni Ting It all started when Ting got busted for staying out 'til 5 in the morning to watch a drag race. Poppy and mommy knew about it and grounded him. (But poppy's the best that he allowed Ting to go out basta he'd ask permission). BUT THEN -- on the weekend of mita's birthday, he was planning to sneak out. I told him to ask permission to papa or I'll do it. For that, he put my esteem to a lower pedestal and called me buang a thousand times ("Naa jud ka problema sa imo utok noh?") WHAT? Iana even backed him up! I'm sorry but I wouldn't want him to hurt mama and papa without me doing something about it. Thank God for Maica. She talked her way to Ting's conscience. But I already lost the esteem I built to compensate for the one I never had.

-> Prelude to cook-out... getting to talk to Paolo I can't help it. He was talking about almost getting the Rivermaya to perform in the Cookout. Tsk. Hey, I no longer have a crush on him, ok?

-> new friends I'm glad I was able to establish new friendships from the first year and second year mass comm students (thank God for the Comm UP Execom. In fairness, the ones I thought to be snobbish are actually really friendly. Never judge a book, just cover it -- ay, wrong... never judge a book by its cover! Indeed! Just be friendly!

-> the Dev Comm forum I hate forums. They're a surefire way to make me cry. But Sir Maganaka just had to do it. Fine. I wanted to divert my attention to another self-battle and not to the overly narrated "ugly duckling" story. But the people before me were running out and it was my turn already. I talked... I blabbed... I stammered... and I cried. Argh!

The planned script: When I was young, my brother kept on teasing me -- the way I look, the way I am. And the impact of that childhood nightmare still hunts me today. (Or something like this) What came out? ... blabbing, stammering and lots of tears. Screw those forums! But I have to be fair, many realizations dawned on me via the forum. I'm not alone and I envy those who have so much in life that they tend to overlook the obstacles. We all have so much to live for and so many obstacles, but the difference is that some allow the obstacles to weaken them (Me! Me!), while others use it to strengthen them.

-> The Belgian Boys Choir in SM Nothing beats leaving off where reality puts you and stepping on a different pedestal. And when this pedestal gets you closest to heaven, it is incomparable! That's the treat the Belgian Boys Choir allowed us to have. (well, at least for me) Although I was not familiar with most of their pieces, they still captured my affinity. And I guess that would be an understatement to describe how they brought the house down when they sang Tanging Yaman and Hindi Kita Malilimutan. A young boy (around 10) with the falcetto voice definitely stole everyone's heart. In fact, I think the young ones put the angelic back to the full volume of the tenors, making the choir, well, the Belgian Boys Choir! They also sang the Chorus (a piece in my violin lessons), some familiar symphonies and that strong, fast, passionate "te-nen-nen-nen-dung-dung" piece. I know my description doesn't make sense but by being there, there's not much need for sense, only listening.

-> Certified stress reliever! Not at all new to me, I had several squabbles with my "darling" sister Maica in July. One was really disheartening that I never felt so down. (She accused me of being so rude and used that to justify why Ting didn't listen to me when I asked him not to sneak out. When I tried to explain how hurt I got when Ting cursed me, she said I deserved it. That was the punch line -- and I mean a punch to my face. Even though she still has those Maica days (the spoiled, "I get what I want," "get out of my way or I'll kick your face"), I believe she's a good sister. But she could never understand.
At that moment, I felt that the only things that understood me were the piles of disarranged clothes in the closet. Without further ado, I fixed all of them. And it worked! (But don't let this secret out or my sisters would "abuse" me always)

-> Meeting Kat and talking "Violin" with her We first talked when she asked about Kate Torralba on the day we met in Ayala. I knew her as the bestfriend of Jason, the pretty, the friendly, the nice, and the really rich Kat. But during Pia's welcome back party (she's now based in Manila and recently had a visit with her twins, Andre and my namesake Evie... EeeeeeEEEeeE! SooOOoOooO cuties!), we talked like we've been friends forever. It just so happens that she's also taking violin lessons -- and at the Sala Foundation, at that. Tsk. We actually have so much in common -- the violin, we adore Kate Torralba and we have the same crush -- the cute, rugged guy/violinist from the Peace Philharmonic Orchestra. The BIG hitch: he MIGHT be gay. WHAT? Which brings me to that "Now that I found you" movie night out I had with my sisters. We were passing by Sbarro when I saw someone familiar. It was him! Gasp! He was having dinner with who seemed like his mother (not that I know them!). And he's really cute! Gasp! It was quite embarrassing because when I told Maica and Iana about him, we all looked at their direction together and they saw us. Eeeek! They noticed us! Gasp! He's so cute! And he plays the violin! Sigh.

I have to say, Kat's one of the people I was easily comfortable with.

-> Hi, Johanne! OoOops, I did it again! Let my 5:16pm post in my assignment notebook on August 9, 2004 do the rest of the talking.

"I can't believe my -- stupidity? A little after 4, my classmates and I hang out at Batibot and when Johanne showed up, they kinda teased. Tsk! Tsk! A little before 5, when Tif and I were on the way to the lib, he showed up again and we were about to meet. Tif kept on nudging me -- introduce yourself, introduce yourself. I just kept on laughing. Then, as if a gasp of wind got it out of my system, just as we are about to walk past each other, I just blurted, 'Hi Johanne!' and walked away instantly. WHAT? I just did that. before I write down my rush of emotions, let me tell you that I got a very nice reply. he himself looked so surprised, like 'Oh... hi!' And maybe he smiled. Awwww... I don't know what got into me but I just did that and I’m sure no force on earth can take that away now... WOW! Tif said I looked stupid but I can't say. I’m not sure if I'm still crushing on Johanne but definitely, my guts are exhilarating. I just did that. I know he's a really nice guy, but I'm not sure if I still have the guts to show my face to him ever again. Wow, it feels good. Tsk."

-> Amazing July? And how! i realized that i may be 3 third year college student now, but i'm still living a high school student's life -- getting (and staying) dreamy, giddy, hopeful, and young.

A Blue-blooded Maroon Story

2004-08-14T15:00:00.001+08:00

They say writing it while still fresh is the best way to blab about a day gone happily and positively wild. And the sensation is still fresh indeed (even after one day)! i think this could span a whole week or so. Well, i did dream of this moment for as long as i could remember -- probably since the game i first saw Rich Alvarez playing in for the Blue Eagles at the UAAP. And that's years ago! Now, he's shooting hoops for PBA. Oh, time! But let me cut the crap and get straight to what i'm going to say...

AUGUST 12, 2004 i saw, met, took pictures with and (slightly) harrassed (hehe, kidding) RICH ALVAREZ, ENRICO VILLANUEVA, WESLEY GONZALES, MIKE CORTEZ and REN RITUALO. Ok, they aren't exactly the PBA superstars, but they were my UAAP superstars. i witnessed Rich winning his 2 MVPs in a row; Enrico getting his own MVP (afterward), saw Wessaving games when his team mates weren't "in the game" (and still save the pic nicole sent of him showing Mac Cardona who the champs were), got amazed by Mike who was definitely the most intenseful player ever (and later, felt for him when he lost the MVP to Enrico), and cheered when RenRen made those consecutive 3 points for the Green Archers that bagged them the top trophy of the season (was that on his last year?). Of course, the closest i got to them (THEN) was via studio 23, right at the comforts of the couch. but nevertheless, i cheered on, showing less school spirit (for the pitiable UP Maroons) and more fondness for the blue eagles. (I have to admit, i also hooted for LaSalle when i sympathasized with them for not getting the championship in 2002; but still the same, i knew ateneo was worth the trophy, or even more.) For the record, i'm a proud maroon; but i love the Blue Eagles.

Fast forward to today: when maan told me the day before that Rich was going to be part of the PBA campus tour, i was SO ecstatic that the only option before me was to MEET him. days before, i just discarded the big banner that announced their tour. now, see how the mention of Rich Alvarez changed everything -- i charged my camera, got it ready, ignored my homework, almost missed my class, became an instant jologs, ran around to get pictures, looked crazy, getting laughed at... right in my academic turf. so what? Who goes home with the pic (and the crazy memories) anyways?

So...

* after the players were making their "tour" around the campus and started walking to the open stage, i made the first FANatic move (everyone was just watching so i broke the ice. hmph. tsk.)and came as close as i could to rich and asked for a pic with him.

On Rich he was really shy and "uncool" about everything. not the negatively "i'm so famous, get off my way" uncool. he was very uncomfortable (a.k.a not used to the mob? Tsk.). okay, that's the best way to put it. but really, he's a true hottie in the flesh! damn those unjustifiable magazines and television appearances!

On Enrico and who said he's got no appeal? damn those magazines and TV appearances for not giving justice to enrico! really, i was so blue-struck when i saw him. it seemed like a minute ago, i just saw him struggling under the basketball net in one of Ateneo's toughest games -- the next, he's just a meter away from me. EeeEeEee! And he's a true cutie, promise!

On Wesley school jock he is! (no wonder Pia used to have a huge crush on him) He's a hunk! With that charisma, it doesn't matter if magazines make him look bad. He's really... EeeEeEeeEeeEe! i was in a frantic mode that i forgot a very embarrasing encounter with Wes but fortunately or unfortunately, neil reminded me of it: i finally saw him walking back to the bus and he agreed to have his pic taken with me. the thing is -- my friends weren't there to take the pic. i was worried he might walk away so i just clasped his arm (gasp! i couldn't believe my guts!) and looked for someone to take the pic! Thank God for neil! But really, i couldn't possibly survive if i see Wes again and he'd still remember what i did!

he's like Rich and Enrico -- uncomfortable or still not used to getting "mobbed". but earlier, when he was walking to the stage, he was quite perky. However, these guys were sweet and humble enough to grant signatures and picture taking with the people.

on the other side of the fence...

On Mike school jock he was, and the arrogant one! However, he was suave enough to give signatures and have his pictures taken, too. he's just too much of a jock! when i saw him, i almost forgot his name. really, i was about to say "Cardona". thank God i was saved by my memory! when i was about to take a pic with him, i saw Ren Ritualo...

On Ren Ren ...and i just screamed "Ritualo!" i guess i screwed up the pronunciation of his name because he went, "Ritualo?" and i replied, "Yeah, you're Ritualo, right?" (Tsk. talk about getting nervous of mistaking players for somebody else) and when i pulled both of them in together for a pic, he was like "You stay here in the middle." EeeeeeEeeeeee! i was sandwiched by two former Green Archers who once led their team in bringing honor to their school (however, in the season when cortez played his best, the eagles stole the championship after staying 4 years in the green turf). i wasn't able to help myself that i just exclaimed, "Oh, great! My favorite UAAP Players!" (i guess none of these former UAAP players were gutsy enough to remind me that they were already in PBA... gosh, i don't even know they teams they're in now) and they just hooted. i like ren. he wasn't as affected as Mike.

i know it's crazy that i'm "mobbing" these people who were once ordinary campus figures in their respective universities. i couldn't start imagining how it would be if we have our own UAAP superstars in our maroon land (i guess ida, who's now in lasalle, would laugh out loud when she'd hear this story. tsk.) but you know i'm never pretentious when it comes to meeting people i [used] to look up to, especially the former blue eagles (i tell you, i kept on saying "Go blue eagles")... maybe it's because ateneo's one of my dream schools or simply because they really know how to play the game, but i've always adored them -- especially during the time of rich and enrico. and sorry to say this, i almost mumbled "go blue eagles" even to mike and ren. (tsk.) but i never got to say "go green archers" because i never really had affinity for that team.

It was a blue-blooded fan story staged in my maroon turf.

--> even with my pics and "mobbing" stories, nothing would ever beat hera's. she was walking to the school and wondered why UP was so crowded. she discarded the huge buses she was walking past when two big guys approached her (as expected, she was so stunned by their heights) and asked for her num. her first words, "kinsa mo?" (haha. that's my friend) and they just laughed. they brought her to their bus and pointed out the (THEN) mystery player who asked for her num (hera said the player jokingly hid behind the seats). hera asked who they were again and when the guys answered, "from the PBA," she was very shocked. so she just mumbled, "hanggang kailan kayo dito?" "hanggang monday". she didn't know what to do then but when she saw asi taulava and sensed "damn, they're really the PBA players!" she embarrasingly got off the bus and (tentenen) the two players followed her to get the num. (hera laughingly said that one of the players gave his cell to her so she could fill in her num but she didn't know how to use it so she just asked him to type it in... hehe, i love my friend). and that's just the beginning.

at around for 4 am the next day, i read hera's message to me sent in at 12 am: "Ivi, guess what? the PBA player texted me. his name is (gasp!) WESLEY." You read it right! If there's no other wesley in the PBA contingent that went to our school (and nobody used his name for effect), then it's none other than WESLEY GONZALES. if only i could write in my kakilig, kaenvy, kaexcited, kafreaked out, ka... HERA! that's a campus crush ng bayan (not to mention, Pia's favorite among the eagles), even a certified cutie (by national standards!). eeeeEeEEeeeee! i was so excited that my classmates were like, "Iv, murag ikaw gitextan niya" (hehe). when i asked hera if she was excited, she replied, "O uy, PBA player gud. But wala lang jud ko kaila niya." (hehe.) just like what she texted after revealing to me who that mystery number-asker was, "kaila ka?" their text messaging went like this (sorta):

mystery player: still up?
hera: yup. but i'm sorry for asking. your number is not my phone book. who's this?
mystery player: ako yung humingi ng number mo kanina. i'm wesley. nagising ba kita?
...
wesley: so, where do you live?
hera: i'm renting an apartment near UP.
wesley: do you have a curfew?
hera: nope.
wesley: do you drink?
wesley: nope.
wesley: ang bait mo pala.

-the end-

"hera, why didn't you text back?" "ivi, la man siyay klaro." that's hera for you. (hehe) lesson earned, wesley might be a UAAP superstar and a certified cutie mobbed by TV, magazines and people all the same, but he's also a boy that can easily be smittened. In this case, the victimizer is my sweet friend hera. gee, i never knew i could get THIS close to him. thanks to the delicate beauty that is my friend! (haha, according to neil, "vita ha, very close to hera na because of this" excuse me, we've been friends since then noh! thanks for shouting out loud neil. tsk.)

he texted again last night, during the cookout celebration (speaking of the cookout, well, that's another story) but hera wasn't able to reply because she had no load. when i got to where she was staying in, she told me about it and i told her to text him through my phone! (eEeEEeEeEeeeee!) okay, nothing follows.

call me crazy and a total jologs, but moments like these come in a million.

2004-08-06T22:34:00.000+08:00

Me and John in a skibob! OoooOOh, wheeeeEeee! Speed, water, wind and courage never felt so sensational!

2004-08-06T22:33:00.000+08:00

Island hopping takes on a different meaning in our family - it's our ultimate family gathering! Around 30 minutes away from the Mactan shore lies the three rock islands owned by tito Paquito and his family (the rock island in the pic is one of it). We've been "hopping" here for quite many times already but it still doesn't tire us. Well, just bring on the sun, water, sand, island, and LOTS of FOOD and we'll do just fine!

2004-08-06T22:30:00.000+08:00

don't be mad guys, be even! hehe, kidding. like what they say, flaunt it if you've got it. and you just did! ok, ok, tell me when you're done saving the pics to your diskette and PCs so i can erase it and spare you (and me) from possible "anti-porn" sermon. tsk, tsk. kidding!

2004-08-06T22:28:00.001+08:00

by request again... (tsk...)

2004-08-06T22:28:00.000+08:00

friends are where the fun is!

2004-08-06T22:25:00.000+08:00

I bet they'll kill me if they'll find out I'm showing this for the whole world of net surfing to see! Sowee "Cold Babes"! (Ok, to save myself, i won't name them nalang!)

2004-08-06T22:24:00.000+08:00

A "little" drink does not do any harm - like, really! It was a last minute decision among us cousins after watching Paolo Santos live in Ayala's Cinema 1. That's Joseph, his GF Jeanette, Bennet, Maica, Iana, Carla, Carlyn, Jason, Chitoy, Jeanette's boss Etos, and ME behind the cam. I'm not even sure if I should be showing this. Ooops! (i was "dizzy" by then)

2004-08-06T22:22:00.001+08:00

As usual, she was in her ever-friendly mood. She gave me this magazine where her deceased dog Pucci was last featured. Awww...

2004-08-06T22:22:00.000+08:00

Who is that lady obviously leaking with so much style, fashion and glam? Kate Torralba dear! Of all the times she invited me to drop by a Cebu 28 shoot for an interview with her, it had to be after our acquaintance party. Believe me, it took so much courage to show up (after a long period since the first time we met) in my rugged sneaks, shorts and polo. But what the heck? I was about to meet one of my sweetest friends.. Kate!

2004-08-06T22:20:00.001+08:00

And the people who made fun out of the many glitches! (behind, left to right) treasurer Chaz, interior vice chair Gigi, 3rd year rep ME, auditor Arrah, 2nd year rep Vianney, (front, l to r) Chair Narsh, (seated) secretary Lady, 1st year rep Ives, interior vice chair Gee, former chair and current club adviser Nice and 4th year rep Domeng.

2004-08-06T22:20:00.000+08:00

by request... (hehe)

2004-08-06T22:18:00.000+08:00

Smile everyone - you're on camera! For a moment, there were no divisions according to year levels in the place.

2004-08-06T22:17:00.001+08:00

Cutie alert! Only the blind won't be able to spot him. (Almost) everyone was so game during the party. Not only did I see fun littering the place but also guts (many of the pips were in two piece suits!).

2004-08-06T22:17:00.000+08:00

Until now, I'm so proud of the guts I pulled off to be able to interview one of the country's top fashion designers, Randy Ortiz. Thanks to Joefrance for the opportunity. I'm just so lucky Randy happens to be one of the nicest. Anyway, this took place a few minutes before the Weddings at the Waterfront 2004 fashion extravaganza took place. I had so many firsts on that experience!

2004-08-05T22:45:00.000+08:00

Riding the kaoshung bus is fun -- NOT! We didn't feel different from the windows that seemed very loose from the metals that held it. We were as "tortured" as they were. Hehe. Anyhow, it was for free. With the crisis hounding just about anything, it would be stupid not to grab anything that's tagged free. And besides, it transported us to "the best acquaintance party" of COMM-UP daw. Ows?

2004-08-05T22:42:00.000+08:00

One of the many valuable things tita Chona wasn't able to bring to Indonesia was her dog Tutay. I could just imagine her disappointment for that. I mean, during tutay's 2-week stay with us (she had to go to tita Judy because mother doesn't really appreciate furry dogs), I totally fell in love with her. She's so behaved, she's not spoiled, she follows you around and she's just adorable. She was the first answer to my long-time dream of a having a furry dog. Awww...

2004-08-05T22:40:00.000+08:00

And she wore the best gown of the night. I THINK it was from Frederick Peralta.

2004-08-05T22:34:00.000+08:00

Hands down, among all the models that ramped down on my first live fashion show ever, Isabel Roces had the most striking features. Plus, she wasn't the usual stick-thin model. She was just how you imagine a gorgeous model would be.

Pictures -- more than words

2004-08-05T22:30:00.000+08:00

Since I haven't written about thousands of things that had been (out of memory loss, "blogger's block" and plain laziness), I'll just let the pictures do the talking (at least for now?).

I intended to show you more pics from our Bohol trip but these were the only ones left stored in my cam's memory card. I do have the rest saved in the CD though. Hopefully soon, I'll be able to store them in here. Anyhow, enjoy. :)

2004-08-05T22:21:00.000+08:00

That's tita Chona's youngest, Yasmine. Awww...

2004-08-05T22:19:00.000+08:00

Here's Chloe with her best (and rare) smile with the ever-wacky Enrique. This was their last play at the village playground... God willing, we'll push through with our trip to Indonesia this sem break. I can't wait to see how they've become there already!

2004-08-05T22:18:00.000+08:00

Hanging out with my young cousins at Mamita's place in Paradise. This was taken on the day before tita Chona, Chloe (third from left),Patrick (2nd from left), and Yasmine left for Indonesia to join tito Papao. It's pretty sad to see family members off to somewhere. But yeah, moving on has always been a part of reality. Hopefully, they'll be back in two years. I miss them already!

2004-08-05T22:11:00.000+08:00

That's two of Poochie's first batch of puppies! I gave away the three (to Nang Belen, Bennet's househelp, to Lialiss, Bennet's cousin, and to tito Rico, whose deceased dog we assume fathered Poochie's kids). I kept one and named her Twoshe/Tushi/Tooshi. Fortunately or unfortunately, she's becoming like Poochie!

2004-08-05T22:08:00.000+08:00

The hills are alive with a family picture!

2004-08-05T22:05:00.000+08:00

On our 3rd day in Bohol, we visited Bohol's main attractions -- the Baclayon Church, Chocolate Hills, Loboc River. We were divided into three vans and the "youngsters" occupied this one.

2004-08-05T22:03:00.000+08:00

Here's a peek to the breath-taking endless stretch of white sands that your eyes can feast on during sunsets in Panglao. I'm posing with some cousins here, prelude to our sandball throwing and game of tag. We looked pretty stupid but there's always in that anyway.

No Answer, Just Faith

2004-08-02T23:00:00.000+08:00

Just tonight, when I was supposed to be studying piles of Dev. Comm. photocopies for a big exam tomorrow, I went to The Feast with Maica. It's an event at the Grand Convention every first Monday of the month with Bo Sanchez at the podium, sharing talks and teachings. I still remember the first and last time I attended this gathering. It was two months before tita Menching passed away. Bo's talk and the worshipping touched me so much that I didn’t leave the place with dry eyes. It had the same effect on me tonight.

It felt really good to be there. By the time I entered the hall, the worshipping already started. The band was great. The people were awesome. I was amazed to see many teenagers, probably almost outnumbering the oldies. When a violinist played the introduction to a slow praise song, I cried. Later, as the talk of Bo's guest speaker for the night, Alvin Barcelona, progressed, I shed more tears. Here's one story that explains how Surrending to God's Will really works.

Years before Mr. Barcelona had a son, his wife got pregnant with twins. The first ultra sounds showed two healthy girls. Months into the pregnancy, everything was prepared. The only thing they were waiting for was their natal day. However, in the last ultra sound, the doctor no longer heard a heartbeat. Truth be told, his wife gave birth to two healthy-looking girls via normal delivery and weighing 7.5 each. But instead of bringing his daughters to the nursery, Mr. Barcelona walked to the morgue.

That story alone already tugged the hearts of the people in the hall – drawing such silence and meek sobs. To think, some minutes ago, the same people could barely stifle their laughter to the antics and humor of Mr. Barcelona. He was a funny guy and showed no traces of a man who just lost two girls. He admits that until now, he's still asking God why it happened. He ended the story with this (rephrased): “I kept on asking God why it happened and until now, I still don't have the answer. But the good thing is that, even though I won't find the answer, I’m sure He knows it.”

I bet that's the secret of those who easily get over their problems. Faith is all we need.

^^^

I still owe you a lot of things – soon to be translated in blogger terms!

Fun, wet and drunk Saturday

2004-07-27T23:00:00.000+08:00

Few days more and I'll be one month short from writing to you.

Geez, the times! Soon, I'll be 19. But before I move too fast to that 29th day of August, let me justify the blogger-worthiness of these past few weeks (yeah, before you assume that they've been totally a big bore for not letting you know about it).

JUST RECENTLY

Saturday, July 24, 2004

I got drunk again! I'm not trying to sound too excited here -- it's just that I never thought a few gulps of Sprite with Gilbey's Vodka would pin me down right away. Before I knew it, I was interviewing Jason about his love life. (Tsk, my favorite part in getting wasted.) And I'm really glad we discovered another way to get ourselves drunk without shelling out more than a few hundreds for a bottle of Tequila. Hehe.

Before that, we watched Paolo Santos live at Ayala Center's Cinema One. I have to say that I'm a big fan but I didn't leave the show too happy. It was so bitin and though some unfamiliar songs he sang were nice, they were unfamiliar. To think, it was a full cinema. Anyway, all I could end this with is -- he should have brought the Hourglass band with him. Hmph.

Right after the concert, my sisters and I, Bennet, Carlyn, Carla, Jason, Joseph, Jeanette, her boss Etos and estranged cousin Chitoy hang out at our place (you already know what comes with it, ryyyyyyyt?). It was WAY better and fun than having to drive to Vudu and stand around in the crowd not doing anything. During the drinking spree, we tried to get Carlyn wasted but I was mostly the one who downed her drinks. (Tsk.) Before I knew it, I was talking. (Number one give-away that I hit the drunk mark.) Later on, the equally wasted Chitoy was hitting on Carlyn. (That was pretty fun. Hehe) But the best part -- not vomiting!

Earlier... July 27, 2004

I thought Saturday would be nothing more than our acquaintance party. But I underestimated that, too. It was so much fun. I guess it makes a difference when you announce that it will be a swimming party rather than an eat-all-you-can socializing. Attendance was good (save for some killjoys, hehe).

Of course, the glitches were the ones that completed the event. My fellow officers weren't prompt queens on that day so we weren’t able to go to the place earlier than the rest as planned. So when we arrived at the Aqua Cainta (via our pleasant kaoshung buses), everyone and everything went on panic mode. The people were frowning with hunger, the place where we were supposed to settle in was not ready (some cottages that were originally reserved for us were occupied already), and churva churva churva (Tsk. There goes the influence my lady/bakla classmates have passed on). What more? I was pissed off by one yearmate who pinned me down in such a nasty tone and grilled me where her P150 went. (I'm not even sure if she paid at all)

But I'd have to say that these same people saved the day. Honestly, I didn't really get to enjoy the event (since I was killing myself to prepare the program and the games) but seeing them having so much fun swimming and participating in the games paid for it. (I hope this is not too dramatic a tone of blogging. Tsk) Most of the fourth years were clad only in two-piece suits and just as I thought they’d pass from joining the games (you know, arte arte), I was proven wrong when they didn't complain at all and were actually the most participative. (Never judge people according to how they walk, act in school or how they wear their clothes.) Equal to them were the first years. They made the word fun an understatement to describe the event.

So the rest of the day was really good. There were extra foods, drinks and – fun. To cap it, it was successful. And I'm just glad to have been a part of it. ('Cos really, if my chummy classmates didn't make me their block rep, I wouldn't have gone to the party -- kill!).

This part of my story wouldn't be complete if I won't mention Tarahashi Urdaneta. I hope I could start blabbing how he captured the fondness of so many of us but I probably wouldn't stop. Tsk. Basta, he reminds me of Jay Hernandez from Crazy/Beautiful and Michael Larrazabal, my high school classmate/crush. A little information about him: he's the only GUY among the froshies (actually, there are 8 biological male but the rest are questionable -- Oh no, hope they won't be able to read this!... feelingera! Tsk).

The party ended at 530 in UP but it didn't end for me. You see, a day ago (Friday, July 26), Kate Torralba texted and told me that she was coming for a shoot for Zee and Cebu 28 and invited me to it. I wasn't planning to go anymore since Iana wanted me at home by 630 so we could all go to Paolo's concert early. But when she said she was only at Luna Studio (an art gallery near UP), of course I didn’t pass the chance to.

It was really nice seeing her again. We've been friends for quite a long time already but we've only seen each other twice. I was slightly embarrassed because I was only geared in my shorts, shirts and a rugged and wet sneaks (straight from the acquaintance gud) while she was in full fashionista gear. But she was so nice. I also got to meet executive producers and directors of Cebu 28 and one really checked my outfit (yuck, yuck, yuck, haha). But later on, they were pretty cool.

Kate mentioned that she was very sorry about the interview that she botched to finish. I'm glad she even cared to remember. That makes such a sweetest friend.

Okay, words are failing me now. Let me compensate for this through pictures. Hopefully, they'll find their ways here VERY soon.

clueless 'til it's gone

2004-07-02T23:30:00.000+08:00

before i treat myself to another dose of dreams of leaving the country, let me just tap on the real deal of the whole "leaving" thing. just a day ago, tita chona left for indonesia with chloe, patrick, yasmien and yaya josa and finally met up with tito papao who's been based there for the past 2 months. the whole bunch will be living there for the next two years. if i feel a slight rush of sadness, i wonder how mamita feels, considering that she's always got a special fondness over her youngest son. because of this incident (well actually, so many events have already served as eye-openers to me), i realized that leaving the country is not exciting at all. more than leaving what you've been accustomed to your whole life, it's leaving the family that bothers the most. and i don't think i'm ready to let go as yet. but yeah, life's got to move on. hopefully, the next years will guide me to which path i have to follow to find my eternal happiness. Echos! let's Amen to that!

speaking of leaving, i made a note about leaving chinchin, inspired while she was sleeping right beside me on my last night in ormoc (june 1).

i harboured many feelings while i lie in the bed and chinchin was curled up just beside me. more than anything, it reminded me of the first few months of having chinchin with us. she was still half her size now that i easily fell for her -- being so cute and delicate. she also slept beside me. i didn't even get all disgusted when she pooed and vomited right beside my face. i simply wiped them out of my bed. she was like a toy that was alive and had totally won me over.

that night [when she slept beside me], i also felt so strange especially that maimai, our house cook, told me she sensed something wrong with out household queen. my siblings (who don't really care) also told me (or maybe were just teasing me) that they noticed chinchin is becoming weaker. all these warnings made me so scared that night while i brushed her beside me. i just stayed awake for quite some time and wished for many things: that i'll still see here in her graceful doña position in the driveway while getting her daily sunshine; that i'll still see her waiting (almost) impatiently for me to give her scraps of food during meals; that i'll still see her begging face when she wants to go with us somewhere or she wants me to pick her up and have her rest beside me at the sofa; and that the night i had her sleeping and breathing right beside me after around 7 years won't be the last. more than all these, what i really want is the assurance of always having the feeling that i have an unconditional friend ready to take my embrace whenever i need to hold on to and grip something that can take the blues away.

on a brighter note, we have a new dog! i've always had a penchant for furry dogs -- well, i finally got one in the form of a shih tzu/japanese spits. i don't know if it's fortunate or not, her name is tutay. well, to compensate this name, she's the loveliest dog ever. she follows you wherever you go (plus!). she doesn't jump on you (plus!!). she's so behaved (plus!). she doesn't pee or poo inside (plus! plus! plus!) she's a whole lot of other things and i just love her. yeah, we're becoming a dog sanctuary here and to be honest with you, i'm not irked at all (well, as yet). i guess ever since i got chinchin, i developed a special fondness for dogs. 'tis indeed a blessing.

a little background on tutay: she's the daughter of tita chona's original baby, chichay, who died through mercy killing (since she was just TOO old and was already becoming a candidate for admittance to the mental ward). anyway, tita chona and tito paolo weren't able to bring her along to indonesia and since they're coming back in two years, they want any relative to take care of her so they could easily get her back. carlyn was the first honorable mention but tita didang (with whom carlyn is staying) doesn't like dogs since her three sons are asthmatic. so now, she's sprawled right beside me -- in such cuteness only furry dogs can give. just doggy beautiful!

-> during the span of two days, i had two fights with maica. i don't get her. i just don't get her. but it would be too biased to continue blabbing here. i'm just glad we don't need to say sorry to make up; we just casually talk again after a given time. maybe i partially stirred the first fight but definitely, she hit bad pot on the second one -- and i wouldn't have cared if she stuck her fist to my nose (like what she warned to do several times), sorry just didn't deserve to get out of my mouth. well, just fitting. it didn't get out. anyway, we're in talking terms again (as of presstime) so let's just be all happy.

-> having seen johann twice this day (first, at almost around 8am; next, around 1pm) rubbed on sunshiney attitude on me all day. not that she intended to, but bambam kinda broke into it when she told me that she saw my local rastafarian (the national one would have to be egay... ahem... hehe) with his chinita the other night. haha, let's get real here. i've always known that they're officially a couple but it was the first time i heard that they were "together" (thank God i haven't seen them together yet). right after bambam made the breakthrough, a rush of unknown ions brushed through me. let me just get this straight -- i'm not a bit jealous. (but ok, i didn't think they were still together) i just thought that it wouldn't be right to text him again. ok sure, i don't have silly intentions in texting johann (promise!) -- i really just want to befriend him (especially when i got the slight idea on what he's like) -- but i have to consider how his girl would feel. if i were her, i wouldn't want other girls to text my guy (and the tempting possibility of johann simply texting back for the sake of being respecful is so inevitable... it's making me too guilty to unnotice). do you get the hitch? i do and i say... get it done over with! like in all my crushing experiences, it's never too late to just drop it. :) (as if i'm not used to this... me looking, them, not knowing... at all)

Echos!

but yeah, i wish i didn't have to make a decision and would still get to text him "Hi rastafarian" as much i would want to. Hehe.

-> i would want to make myself sound like a total loser (like i'm not yet one... tsk) and tell you that i completely missed gloria's inauguration as the 14th president of the philippines that took place last Wednesday (june 30) less than 500 meters from where i was curled up like a pig in a couch watching everything take place on TV. really, i would have gotten a more real version of it if i wasn't being too big a loser (the only real thing i got from the event were the gunshots that echoed as far as my sofa). i just missed a history in the making. i just missed seeing fernando zobel (well, i heard he was there), korina sanchez (nag-uulat), kiko pangilinan (uhmm...) , gloria arroyo (just how short is she?), dato arroyo (cute!), and even mikey arroyo (naks!). sigh.

but reality check: there were about thousands of people there. the closest i could have gotten to gloria was if i parked myself just in front of the capitol as early as 6 am -- way ahead the rest of the crowd! but no.

i also missed the fireworks. i was at paradise that very moment saying my last farewell to tita chona, chloe, patrick and yasmien (sob).

i also missed partying with a spotlight that cut through the evening sky. it was so cool i felt like i was in the party -- yeah, some 100 meters away from it.

i just added an item into my "what i've missed and regretted" things. oh well, like i'm not used to it. der.

-> mamita was admitted to the hospital for three days because of a big asthma attack. i'm just glad she's okay now. :)

learning the hard way

2004-06-28T23:59:00.000+08:00

prelude: the cliche you never know what you've got 'til it's gone hit me pretty hard this time. i just took my stint as block rep last schoolyear 2003-2004 for granted. though i attended the late afternoon meetings and participated in its events, i never thought too big a deal out of it.

epilogue: as what i've mentioned, i was nominated secretary for this schoolyear's LIG-ON executive committtee. well, i lost it. and i don't feel bad about not getting the slot. i feel bad because i'm no longer part of the LIG-ON execom. yup, i'm actually gonna miss it. our class gave the block rep position to jackie this year (of course, i chipped in the idea of letting others try it, too) and so i got officially ripped off the team today. so bad. i'm gonna miss those guys.

and the lesson speaks: that's a slap on your face.

the last retort: for some reason, they still got me to represent the block to Comm UP. though it's never the same with mingling with people from different courses, let me just take on my job with more care. i just earned my lesson from my LIG-ON experience. and besides, it will be nicer to enjoy it more than miss it after. :)

hope i'm making sense here. just to air out my frustration.

memory's sake the LIG-ON Exe Comm 2003-2004

Chair Van Owen Pelayo
Vice chair Choy
Secretary Geraldine Aguelo
Treasurer Vera Leigh Lasam

Block Reps

Comm Sci Josh & Noynoy
Math Allan
BSM Tresi & Ron Carmona
Pol Sci Phrixel Pimentel
Psych Frannie
Biology Penny
Mass Comm Vita Rodriguez
Fine Arts Honorato Corpin III

pictures soon. i still owe you the last plugs on bohol and other meaty personal stuff.:)

the rasta behind the girl in the mirror ; )

2004-06-28T07:30:00.000+08:00

i think it would be fitting to give you a long post now to make up for the week of not blogging. Ooops, i actually missed you for that long. not that my life has been totally a bore the whole past week. in fact, i'll let you in on some moments that are still stuck in my memory and can't get out (as yet).

-> for the first time since February (and since i i started my stalker texter phase. tsk), i saw johann! EeEeeeeee! i was waiting to buy camote at manang lisa's outside school (it's so good i think can replenish myself around 6 packs in a day!) when someone SO familiar started walking towards the gaisano tambayan (in UP's geography, that's just near manang's store!). i totally freaked out not merely by his presence but also with his hair! EeeEeeee! he's got dreads already! EeEeeEeeEee! my appetite for the camote totally vanished and so i just went home right away. and no longer your lola, i texted him, "hey, nakadreads naka ha!" haha! he replied that he's just sporting it because med school does not allow it (and i think he's going next year). o0Ooh. anyway, he reminded me of egay but that's another story.

-> yesterday, we were invited at the dinner party of alex reyes (actually, iana was invited but naapil nalang mi.. hehe) needless to say, i ate a mountain again. their dessert entree was so sugary good, i think i could have drawn ants in a second. anyway, all his cousins were there (and i actually had fun listening to sydney's antics. he was really funny and kept on repeating that basing mabayot na siya because of joevince. haha) you should know that the family of alex is really tisays/tisoys personified. (so we weren't out of place only because we don't belong to the Sainzes, but also because they looked so... tisays/tisoys, hehe, corny) the point being, eeeEeeeE! i think i have a crush on marco. well, this always happens. firstly, he's the namesake of my long-time crush (that would be marco lobregat) and next, i just saw him -- so the rush of having just seen him is still very fresh and might just rot later on. well, let's see.

and why i kinda like him? well, after jimmy bondoc's concert last march, we talked. that might be a very small deal for most girls but i usually freak out when guys talk to me. at that time, i did freak out but managed to let out some things naturally. anyway, i had more things to say in my fornowan blog so just drop by. :)

-> okay, i'll let my secret out. i still get slightly fanatic when i see any of michael jackson's performances on TV. in fact, i slept around 12 just to finish a special MJ presentation on ABS-CBN last night. now let me get to my point -- i just love man in the mirror! the thing is, i only heard the solo guitar version (hourglass' paolo tiongson plays it SO good). when i finally got the lyrics, i fell in love with it. i think it's one of the best i read. ok, let me cut the crap and just paste it in here. enjoy.

Man In The Mirror

I'm gonna make a change for once in my life
It's gonna feel real good, gonna make a difference, gonna make it right.

As I turn up the collar on my favorite winter coat
This wind is blowing my mind
I see the kids in the street without enough to eat
Who am I to be blind
pretending not to see their needs?

A summer's disregard
a broken bottle top and a one man's soul
They follow each other on the wind, ya' know
'cause they got nowhere to go
That's why I now want ya' to know:

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
I'm asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer:
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make a change!

I've been a victim of a selfish kind of love
it's time that I realize
That there are some with no home
not a nickel to loan.
Could it be really me pretending that they're not alone?
A willow deeply scarred
somebody's broken heart and a washed-out dream
They follow the pattern of the wind ya' see
'cause they got no place to be

That's why I'm starting with me!

I'm starting with the man in the mirror . . .
I'm starting with the man in the mirror . . .

I'm starting with the man in the mirror - oh yeah!
I'm asking him to change his ways
- 'cause you better change! -
And no message could have been any clearer:
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make the change.
You gotta get it right while you got the time
'Cause when you close your heart then you close your your mind!
That man, that man - with that man in the mirror
- that man, that man

That man, that man
- I'm asking him to change his ways

better change!
That man, ya' know, that man

- no message could have been any clearer: -
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make a change!

Gonna feel real good
yeah!
I'm gonna make a change
it's gonna feel real good!
Come on
- change -
just lift yourself

you know you've got to stop it
yourself
- make that change!
I've got to make that change today
- man in the mirror -.

You got to - you got to not let yourself - brother - ya' know -
I've gotta get that man - that man -
you've got to - you've got to move
Come on - come on - you've got to stand up -
stand up - stand up -
Stand up and lift yourself now -
gonna make that change - come on -
You know it - you know it - you know it -
you know - change
Make that change!

-> i have more to say in the post I prepared in our PC (yup, it's fine now but still no internet!) but i'm not yet sure how to transfer it right in here (we have no ink and i think our floppy disk drive is not in its mood). i only hope it doesn't get too rotten before it arrives here! Tsk.

beyond the book's cover

2004-06-26T23:00:00.000+08:00

You might not believe it but the reason why I haven't blogged for days is that the academic stuff has piled up faster than I expected it to. Over the last week, we had a big quiz, an oral recitation, a big project (which is due next Thursday, the first of July), and some other things to add to my anxiety to start violin lessons again, my "bead business," my long-time plan to formally contribute to Sunstar Weekend and a block rep position in UP's Mass Comm Org. But let me not get too quicky here and slow it down.

Last Friday, mother and father went to Subic for a BCBP business. They left Bien here with us so I was very keen on spending as much time with her. Well, save for Friday night when I watched an acoustic show with Iana, Carlyn and Melissa at Kaona Grill. It was a treat seeing Pandora's Box again though I was disappointed because they didn't play too much Sting anymore. (bad) They only did Englishman in New York and it wasn't as good as the version of Hourglass. And mind you, I didn't say that only because I still have a huge crush on Egay! Anyway... enter Burning Culture, a reggae band with cool beats. Though their songs were either unfamiliar or too cheesy, they pulled off a great performance. (plus, they have an Egay look-a-like. Shucks, I'm hooked to seeing him everywhere!)

Anyway, on Saturday, we took Bien around Ayala. She was so cute looking all so excited but later on, when I had to carry her, it would have taken only a little motivation for me to strangle her. She was already having tantrums so walking was no longer fun. Argh. For that night, Iana, Carla and I were supposed to go out. In fact, Carla had something more naughty in mind -- going to a gay bar! Haha! And just as we thought she wasn't really serious about it, she was very disappointed when we told her we couldn't go on with the gimmick because our parents were unexpectedly arriving from Manila. Ok, that's a big lesson for us -- always take Carla seriously.

Sunday was Father's day. I'm so glad papa liked the swimming shorts we bought him from Speedo (thus the almost empty savings envelope). We had lunch at Don Hen but we should have gone to Krua Thai or somewhere else. Yes, they have good food but their service is one of the worst. So much for spending much. Later in the afternoon, we went to tita Chona's house to get some things mama bought from her and also for her and papa to say their last farewell because Tita Chona, Chloe, Patrick and Yasmien will be joining tito Papao in Indonesia around early July. It's pretty sad. I'm gonna miss them, especially Patrick's smile. It seems like it can never fail to take your blues away :| No kidding.

After Consolacion, we took another long drive to the South Reclamation Project. It's a very long detour (15-minute drive) along the sea for people from the North (or South; basta to Talisay) to take to avoid traffic. It's still so clean and virgin that if you look at the right side, you'd feel you're somewhere else. But on the other side, thousands of squatter houses are scattered. When I talked to Gee and Chai about it, they told me to think twice before considering that "amazing road" a development. They told me that the original wwsidents there,who mostly were fishermen, were uprooted with no defense from their homes and livelihood and transferred to the mountains. Which is basically stupid, because how can they quickly take in another kind of livelihood after having spent most of their lives fishing? This is another lesson: before considering something as a development, look beyond its physique and see what went behind it. If only our government would be more dedicated to augmenting people's lives than making a mark for themselves.

Guess what? I don't know if they were serious but last Tuesday, some classmates blurted out that they would have wanted me as Comm UP's Chairperson. Actually, their unanimous vote was Narsheen but they knew she wanted to concentrate on her studies so they put me as their second choice. Yeah, right. But to be honest, I was very touched (uhm, flattered). Anyway, I missed the general meeting on Monday because 30 minutes was too long a wait (inutil lang jud) so I don't know what really transpired from there. Well, I became a block rep. Hmmm... I'm actually becoming the official block rep of my block. Tsk. On Thursday, during LIG-ON's General Meeting, I was nominated secretary for our batch org. Asa ka? No noh, I could be a block rep forever but a secretary's job sounds really more difficult. But I'd have to admit, flattered ko. Tsk.

The end of the week would have to be the most rewarding. For the first time since February, I saw Johann. EeeEeEeeEk! He's already in dreads! EeeEeEeeEk! He looked so cute. I totally freaked out when I saw him again, with the crazy notion that he'd know me by now -- his stalker texter. Uy, no noh! Haha! Though I'm capable of that (tsk, just kidding), I just sent him a "Happy Vacation" message at the beginning of summer. I never really expected him to reply but to my fortune, he did. And I've been playing with an on/off crushing game ever since. Through that, I was able to draw some info about him -- he's gonna graduate this October (sob) and will proceed to med school (ahem), and that he's just sporting the dreadlocks now because it's not allowed in med. EeeEeEeeEk! He's the bad boy but respectful type of guy. Well, that's in my perspective and I don't know him that much so don't take this as a basis for anything. In fairness ha, he trimmed down... a bit -- I think. :)

Before I forget to mention...

-> our computer is fine already but the phone line is not yet connected so a little tiyaga please...!

-> I already have a name for our new puppy... Tushi/Tooshi/Tooshy/Twoshe!

-> For the last two weeks, I've been postponing violin lessons. I'm not sure what reason to bring up this time. I guess I don't think my arm could hold for two straight hours of playing. But I love it. I'm loving it. I know that the force that's influencing me to stop is just the loser [in me] that's been stopping me to go for what I truly love. And this time, (hopefully) I won't let it get the better of me. (BTW, I finally had my lessons today)

-> I wonder why Iana is closer to most of our cousins, even those who are my age. It really hurts, blog, especially with Carlyn. But I've been bugged by this for what seems like forever that I think it won't be long before I start considering it as the only measure of joy/value in my life, which is of course, totally untrue. Now let me prove that. (Get real!)

-> I stumbled upon this certain blog and I got so green-eyed envious because it had such a long board for comments. I don't even have A comment! Are my posts boring? Am I really boring? Iana blurted to my face one time that I'm really boring (when cousin Marty said goodbye shortly after chatting with me) but would it really be justifiable to consider myself one just because of that? I think I'm too hell bent on satisfying my craving to let it all out. And though it doesn't appeal to others, it does appeal to me. Hmmm... if that's the case, I wonder why I'm still bringing this up.

-> The self-soundtrack of the moment: Happy People by R. Kelly.

Step to the left
Step to the right

That's all.

Stuck in a blank i can't get out of

2004-06-18T09:00:00.000+08:00

i guess our bohol expedition blew me over so much that i overlooked some things that happened after the trip. on top of it is my violin lessons. sir inanoria and i planned to resume our lessons this past wednesday (june 16) after two months of hiatus (when i went home to my province). but i felt i wasn't ready at all that i just asked if we could move it next week. thank God he didn't mind at all. now, my arm would get exhausted halfway through my 1-hour/day aim for practice. the bow touches the strings oftenly that i'm back to hitting the instrument with it when i get too irked already. there are days when i would just skip practice. and to think, i still have two pieces in book 3 i promised to sir that i would master by the time school gets back. i'm such a lame dreamer. i don't do anything at all especially when i don't feel like it. it's because i believe that playing this instrument should not be forced. it should come from within (yeah, sounds like crap but you'll understand if you get your hands on a violin). I'm so scared, if you ask me. many moments i find myself trapped in ideas of just giving it up, even at the risk of hurting my parents (who are excited about it) and the risk of hurting myself. you might think i'm over-reacting and i shouldn't think too much about it but if you love an instrument so much and would like to play it as much as to listen to it, you'd think twice before tagging me as too sensitive. most of all, i don't want this to be another attempt at something that i failed at without even trying to be persistent.

last week didn't help much in my motivation (er, what is its connection to the violin..? but anyway). when we arrived from bohol last monday, june 7, we just had some family bonding and had lunch at Bigby's (yum). but my memory is no longer serving me well i'm not sure what we did after. (i know you're not even surprised) on tuesday, i took my first official job as the new budget officer in our house and paid our Skycable bills. i'm so thrilled to be handling so much money now (hehe) and even the accounting is pretty fun (well, at least for now when i don't lack money yet) though it's driving me crazy, too. in a way, i guess i'm living my dream of being a cashier in a store. (yeah, i am a dreamer) for the rest of the day, i just tagged along mother around and acted the obedient daughter's role (tough one). the next day, june 9, we had mass at Cebu's Memorial Park and buffet lunch (hmmm...:) at Grand Convention in honor of tita Menching's 3rd death anniversary.

on the same day, i went to school to enrol. (okay, that knocked some sense into me: no more delusions of summer NOT being over yet) good thing the people at the College of Secretary Office (hmmm... is this what CSO stands for?) didn't act as the lazy bums they mostly are. (they're already in air-conditioned rooms -- sosy!) roaming around the campus didn't do anything feel-good to me, but seeing my friends definitely saved the day. even though my skin transformed from brown to browner, they overlooked that and told me i trimmed down a bit. (i LOVE these people!)

it was so bad when mother left in the afternoon for ormoc. yes, when i was in ormoc and she started her menopausal fits, i prayed we would be in cebu again and free of her clutches. but reality sets the truth free and this includes feeling so sad without mother (and all of her) around. okay, i was in a depressed mode and just stared at our bohol pictures for hours. i guess having been in the presense of so much family for days makes you feel super nostalgic when they're already at a distance. oh life! Why am i even surprised?

on friday, iana, carla, angi and i watched Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen. okay, it was easy to categorize it under the oh-no-not-another-teenage-movie but somehow, i realized i was like her (in fact, i think anybody could relate to the character of Lola). what sets me apart from her though is that while i daydream, i don't really expect reality to appear just how they do in my mind. and that's sanity. otherwise, i would be expecting to see everything in my dream to be right in front of me (i'm not that insane, okay). AND -- andy garcia was such a treat. on the next day, we saved carlyn from drowning amidst chemistry books (oh, the naning days of a freshie!) and went to SM. we were supposed to do the grocery after watching Singles (aubrey was really funny and angel was pretty good, too; the rest was... think of any ara mina movie) but tita Judy arrived so we just tagged along and helped (in any way we can) while she bought some house stuff for carlyn. in between this, we were treated to yummy feasts at Sbarro and then Red Ribbon. (double, double yum) it was a cool mall afternoon with our favorite tita and cousin ;)

we brought them home around 930 pm and drove to carla's after for a last minute planned mahjong session. upon our arrival, we whipped out our 1 pesos and played from 10 pm down to 5 am the next day. we risked a peso for every game and 3 for every 5th one. as if tita judy's sweet treats didn't wear our stomachs down already, we went to starbucks and then AA's at around 1 am to get something to feed our mouths with. (so much for diet) in our pambahays, no noisy crowd, good music, cheap food, cheap drinks, so much fun (and we get to use our brains) -- this is what we call our ideal nightlife.

oh yeah, i lost 17 pesos.

***

back to the present

-> i'm taking up a Spanish elective. ahem... here i come ola, ola!

-> last saturday, i finally sent the writer's folio i promised cheryl since March. i also gave her a home made black y-shaped necklace with swarovskis. (oO0oh.) i feared that it would cost me above 500, my budget. Oo0oh, la la! aboitiz only charged 80 pesos. hai, why do i think everything is so expensive nowadays? well, it really is - save for the aboitiz quikpac! i even had a crazy idea to look for penpals (or ahem, email pals) in manila so i could send more packages because it felt good it only costs 80 pesos! packages for outside the philippines is another story. she got it on monday. how supersonic! (and if i'm not mistaken, she's my very first blog visitor. she wanted to see my pic and so i told her to check you out. and she did and she's very valid to be my first visitor! - okay, okay :)

-> i've never been so driven about anything (okay, save for thousand other things) -- i want to regularly contribute to Sunstar Weekend. i've envisioned myself doing this since summer and now, after hearing neil got assigned to interview the r 'n b girl kyla, i knew i'm really up for this. i'm planning to email ms erma of my intentions (choke, do i have to sound this serious?) after we have our computer fixed. God willing, there will be nothing to hold me back.

at the end of the day, Thy Will be Done.

***

and U2's live version of "One" saved the day! i've never heard such a beautiful and strong chorus of violins. and this is why i can't just give it up.

from swimming to sunset

2004-06-17T08:00:00.000+08:00

the first thing on our agenda during our sunday gatherings at mamita's beach house is to eat (you can never undermine the appetite of any rodriguez family member). well, that's practically the main thing in every family gathering. but when we visited dakak early in april, swimming became the number one item in the to-do list, also during our recent bohol trip. in fact, on our second day in bohol, i swam with my cousins the whole day. sure, we munched on something every once in a while (especially that mamita brought gazillion packs of V-cuts and Tostillas), but we were mostly seen all soaked up in the water and scorched under the heat of the sun. (good thing we were still visible) here's the rest of the story.

Friday, June 4

from 9 am down to 9 pm, we were constantly transferring from the pool to the beach and back. though i couldn't say the pool seemed clean (but definitely, it was cleaner than dakak's!) but we loved the diving board so much. at the beginning, we were mastering our wackiest jumps. later on, we were already learning how to dive. we actually ended our swim at 9 in the evening trying to learn how to jump headfirst. i must have knocked my brains off with too much water already for jumping nth times. at the end of the day, i still didn't get it. but let's not move too fast on my story.

around noontime, the rest of the gang appeared (our dearest parents :). it was cool seeing everybody together at the same place in a completely strange province. we numbered around the 50s, including the help and drivers. the whole stay actually seemed like a picnic. mamita's room was filled with plastics of junkfood, milk, corn flakes, canned goods, drinks, ice, and fruits to the brim. the best part was we could just go there and grab anything. (yum) we also bought our own cooking materials and food stuff and just borrowed the resort's kitchen to cook them. cool, huh? okay, it seemed like one of our sundays at the beach.

the whole afternoon, i waited for the sunset to come. around 4, we trekked to the beach, forming the tallest sand piles, swimming at the puddles, taking pictures, discovering the creatures, throwing sand balls at each other, and simply basking in the beauty of it all. then i realized that the sky was already starting to give way to darkness but i still didn't get the sunset i wanted. it wasn't as beautiful as yesterday. damn, i even had my camera ready. i guess some or most things just come best when you least expect it. the sunset was at its magnificent best on the first day of our stay because i didn't see it coming. i guess that gives more proof that surprises are way better and that nothing really works when you expect too much of it (well, not unless you do something about it, right? :)

***

but i'm not saying it wasn't a food trip, too. in fact, i've never eaten so much rice for a long time already. we had three meals a day (and of course, i took them with much gusto). i guess there's just something in me that allows me to consider any trip as a food trip (and that i'm allowed to gain weight as much as i can). wacko!

to be continued...

bohol's magic touch

2004-06-16T17:00:00.000+08:00

it's funny to think that even though i haven't blogged for days, it still took me a few minutes before coming up with a good start for this post. (so much for blogging just the way i want to. i'm forever conscious about what i write and how i write it :| except for that last minute first day jitter entry, i actually haven't said anything to you ever since i left for bohol. so for this post, that's where i'm gonna start.

Wednesday, June 2

i left for cebu along with my siblings, cousins and a nanny at 8:30. since i couldn't go back to ormoc before class begins, i had to haul all my things back at one trip (that includes one big bag for all my clothes, one maleta for my shoes, several bags for my thingamajigs, and another for the violin -- whew!). the two-hour trip was quite fun especially that supercat's 2nd floor was practically empty except for us and a few other passengers. tita didang picked us up with the caravan -- imagine, we were around 11, and you can never underestimate our sizes so the car was packed to the brim like sardines in a can -- and we had lunch at mamita's after. in the afternoon, mamita treated all of us to shrek 2 (yipee!) and later, i watched all my life with my sisters, carlyn, mel and anya. the cruise was mouth-watering but that still didn't save the movie. good thing aga died or it would have turned out to be another "the same old story" movie. (well, actually, it reminded me of a walk to remember.)

thursday, june 3

our trip to bohol was at 8 am. save for our grandma, 2 titas and several nannies, we were all kids (free from the clutches of our parents... hehehe). it was nice to be surrounded by unfamiliarity again but riding all the way to our resort seemed like another exhausting ride to dakak. it went for miles pass small towns, small forests and small vacant lots. our arrival at the resort would have been relieving but the place didn't seem too inviting (well, at least that was my first impression). anyway, it took a long time before we were settled in our rooms. thank God they were okay. my cousins directly jumped to the pool after putting their suits on. they swam 'til evening. i only followed around 4 in the afternoon. though the pool was too small for us, the diving board saved the stay. we were instantly enrolled in a diving lesson by my brother who was already good at it. cool. but i still can't get the "just let go but make sure your head goes first and your body the next". like almost everything related to sports, i gave up on it. :)

late in the afternoon, we ran to the beach and directly fell in love with it. the water was at its lowest tide and there was a long stretch of white sands, sea weeds, and big puddles sprawled as far as your eyes can see. it was one of the most beautiful sceneries i've ever seen. to add to that, at the end of the stretch was the sun setting in and the clouds breaking into the beautiful colors of the sunset -- violet, orange, red and blue. it reminded me of shawn stockman's visions of a sunset...

visions of the sunset
just appears when i close my eyes
takes me closer to heaven
when the flutes start to fly
and the violins cry...

(oh yeah, it also reminded me of my lack of practice for my violin lessons.) it was so beautiful i almost killed myself for emptying the battery of my digi cam before getting to take a picture of it. while enya's music blasted away from a beach resort nearby, my cousins and i ran across the long stretch and throwed sand balls to each other. we looked pretty funny but we had so much fun. it was all of us against ting. but somehow, he still won.

anyway, that scene made me fell in love with the resort right away. if they were to charge us for getting an access to that scenery, then it would have been beyond our budget. :) i haven't seen anything like it (well, as far as my memories could take me) and when i did, i knew exactly what has been missing in my life --magic. the experience that afternoon just gave me a touch of it. i promised myself to have my camera ready for the sunset the next day.

in the evening, while everyone got ready to sleep, i went to the seashore to hang out with patrick and his nanny, josel. i picked him up from her amidst his struggle and lied down with him in a hammock. it took a long time to get him to sleep -- josel already finished her chika, i sang around 50 "i have two hands, the left and the right" and other kiddie songs, and a shooting star (or a falling meteorite) flew across the dark sky -- but it felt really good when i noticed he already stopped moving in the cradle my arms formed for him. that memory i would always cherish.

speaking of the falling star, i thought i was only imaginging in between the blinking of my eyes but josel saw it too and confirmed it really crossed the sky. and that gave me another access to a magical moment. though it only lasted for a second, a magicless day wouldn't have been any better.

needless to say, i've had too much magic on that first day.

to be continued...

first day jitters

2004-06-14T08:00:00.000+08:00

guess what? i'm in school already. bummer! it's our first day today and i'm actually late for my 730 class already. but i've missed you for more than a week already and i just felt that i really needed to blog. (blush now :) and to make matters less exciting, our PC broke down. it broke down. that means i no longer have everyday access to you dear (unlike the last weeks of summer). double bummer -- as if the dreadful days of school are not enough to make me dislike cebu. o0Oops.

so summer vacation is officially finished. the end of our bohol trip sealed FACT to that. speaking of which, it was SO MUCH FUN. and believe me, it was more than being in one of the most beautiful beaches in the philippines, it was more of the presence of almost all of us based in cebu and ormoc. hopefully, i'll be able to post pictures in here and give you a more detailed story. but now, i have to log out and start running to the undergrad building. ciao!

2004-06-01T23:56:00.000+08:00

bienny, my love!

2004-06-01T23:54:00.000+08:00

me and chinchin, my unconditional friend for the past 8 years! love her so.

2004-06-01T23:49:00.000+08:00

this is how you groove man! that's dickoy (in stripes) showing us his chicken dance with his father tito vicky boy and brother puerto

2004-06-01T23:46:00.000+08:00

high time to smile! this was during the reunion while we took over the registration job: (l to r) the tanned carla, kenny, iana, jeany, me and maica.

2004-06-01T23:43:00.000+08:00

we are family! that's mama and her sisters tita mae and tita daisy sitting with their "descendants" standing at the back during tito Dony's birthday dinner on the eve of our Palou Reunion. It doubled as the rehearsal of tita mae's "hey ya" performance. fun, fun, fun!

2004-06-01T23:40:00.000+08:00

first thing's first: SWIMMING! (so it's no longer eating ha?) the first thing we did when we got to dakak was to change in our suits and ran to the beach.... this is THE life....

2004-06-01T23:39:00.000+08:00

OooH la la! two days of travelling for this? why not coconut? Dakak definitely beats boracay by a landslide in terms of privacy. it also has bora's powdery white sands and crystal clear waters. coWOWbonga!

2004-06-01T23:37:00.000+08:00

me, my sisters maica and iana getting high-time ready to leave the cockroaches [in this small hotel room we stayed in during our stay in cagayan de oro] for dakak!

2004-06-01T23:35:00.000+08:00

here's a partial view of mamita's beach house in albuera. (can you see? can you see the white roof?) :D

2004-06-01T23:33:00.000+08:00

we're "swimming" under the rain! haha! that's carla, iana, me, choochoo and carmeli screaming: "here's to more childhood-y moments like this"!

2004-06-01T23:12:00.000+08:00

my passion